Beautiful Feet

Fairest Lord Jesus

2011-04-23T15:11:00.002+03:00

Last weekend some friends and I went out to the woods to pick flowers. When they first invited me I wanted to go to hang out with my friends, but to pick flowers...ok...

Growing up in Florida I guess I missed what spring meant in the forest...

When this song says
"Fair are the meadows"
I sort of got it. I mean, I'd seen green fields in Ireland. They are breath taking.

I just didn't realize that the next line was just as true
"Fairer still the woodlands robed in the blooming garb of spring."
To walk into a forest with trees coming up out of a quilt woven with green grass and purple flowers--it's the most beautiful sight. And to breath the air in the stillness of the woods. To listen to the trickling of the stream as it flows...incredible, really. Something you can't fathom until you are standing in the middle of it thinking "God, was Eden anything like this?"

And then you start to imagine Eden--far better, far more beautiful than this (which just seconds ago you couldn't have imagined either). And then you move past Eden and start to think about God Himself.

How beautiful must our Lord truly be.
Being with Him caused Moses' face to shine.
Healer.
Redeemer.
Savior.
Calmer of the storm.
Mighty.
King.
Creator.
Deliverer.
Agape.
Beautiful.

Getting Personal

2010-08-27T11:44:00.002+03:00

I had lunch with a friend the other day. We were talking about the things that must be done to acquire a visa to the US. I told her to make sure she knew the names, addresses and phone numbers to all her former schools, universities and jobs. I started to go on about how she should also have her parents passports close by in order to give their information as well, but she stopped me before I got to that part and said something that got me thinking. She said:

"So Americans don't like to share personal information with each other, but they are willing to share it with their government. strange."

Being one of our better interpreters and having worked with Americans for years she wasn't just referring to something she assumed about American culture, but to something she had experienced and knew first hand to be true--in contradiction to her own culture.

When first meeting a person in the states there are some subjects we know to avoid.

This same friend shared in this same meeting that she had been working on paperwork all morning and as she sat in an office waiting her turn there were several older women sitting around who started telling her all about their lives--what the government was (or was not) doing, how their husbands had mistreated them--nothing was taboo or too personal to reveal to this young lady they had never before encountered.

In some ways this makes being a Christian in Ukraine easier for me. [in others more difficult.] Politics and religion are not avoided as topics of conversation. People want to know what you think and believe. And they want to tell you what they think and believe. [the difficult part being that what people think the believe to be fact and not just thought.]

Several weeks ago I was at dinner with two very close friends of mine and another person whom I know a little bit, but have not spent a whole lot of time with. He and one of my friends, in Russian, began discussing camps this past summer. Then the question was posed to my friend: What was your motivation behind working at camp this summer? My friend responded and then this person who had not really been talking to my other friend and I at all until this point in the conversation looked at us and posed the same question. Neither of us [both American] responded at the time. Later that same evening I did discuss this question with my acquaintance (whom I might add is quickly reaching friend status in no small part due to his willingness to be real), but in the moment I was so caught of guard (even after 5 years in country) by the depth of the question.

My friend who had been engaged in the original conversation at the dinner table later asked why [I] hadn't responded at the initial asking of the question. I explained my intimidation both by the Russian and the sincerity of the question. And though it caught me off guard and I froze in the moment, it is one of the things I most appreciate about the culture I am living in. I don't want to be afraid to be real. I don't want to hesitate when people ask about things I once deemed too private to share.

(And just so you don't have to feel too intimidated to ask...I hope; I hope my motivation to do camp this summer was to bring God glory. And maybe that sounds like the answer I'm supposed to give. But it's the one I hope in my heart that is true. I love loving the kids. But loving them to love them is not enough. I love encouraging the staff. But encouraging them so that they are encouraged is not enough. I love organizing and working in the store and doing anything that needs to be done. But helping to help is not enough. I love, I encourage, I help SO THAT others might know Christ better SO THAT as they know Christ better they might share Him with others SO THAT His name may be known and glorified throughout the earth. I HOPE that above all else THAT is my motivation...not just in camps, but in all that I do.)

2010-06-30T13:37:00.001+03:00

The month leading up to camp one was just as eventful and productive and awesome as camp one itself. I'm so glad God uses everything and is in everything and holds all things together.

I love camp. Sometimes I feel like I live for camp. But it's not true. I love camp so much because it causes me to focus. I know that it's all about kids (and staff and interpreters and Americans and parents and me and everyone) knowing Christ. For two months all of everything I'm planning and doing is focused on that. It's exausting and I often ware myself down and this camp I even got pretty sick. But it's worth it and I know that and I love that and my joy is overfilwing.

Before camps opened this summer there was a huge question as to of if they would...if they could. Camp is expensive. There are some regulations that even with enough money just can't be met. Fire laws are confusing. As days started deminishing before opening day we began to pray more expectantly "god, what would you have us to do."

We had a team here getting the camp grounds ready and ministering in our village and surrounding ones as well. And we started discussing new options for summer ministry. What if we did back yard Bible clubs in place of camp. Could we make that work? Would enough of our Ukrainian staff be willing to stay with us if that's what we decided to do? Would American teams be ready to work in harder and potentially riskier environments outside our camp walls?

And then the documents to open camp were signed.

The Ukrainians seemed releaved. America too seemed glad that things worked out. I was glad to have a direction to be planning toward :0)

And camp one was phenominal. It was great. Registration day closed and we were completly full. We even added an extra dorm. I'm living with the summer staff girls, who are great. I got to teach the oldest girls bible study and go to music and games with them. I got to interpret for several Americans who shared the gospel with campers. God is for sure moving at camp friendship this summer. And we've got two more camps to go :0)

But what I'm learning has been more during the time before camp and this time now--between camps, God is in everything. He's moving all the time. He's constantly changing lives. Making me--making us-- more like Him. I don't know what I will be doing tomorrow. Or where I will be. Or who I will be with. Such a simple concept, but I want to make the most of today.

With so many changes going on around me all the time it's good to have my Constant. Christ is my constant. Always with me and always ready to help me do the very thing He Himself came to earth to do. To love.

To love not just during camp. Not just the kids He brings into my life. And not just those I have been preparing to love. But everyone. Every person who passes through my world. Every person whose world I encounter even for the briefest of moments. Lord, teach me to love.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Bible Study at Spring Camp

2010-03-26T15:23:00.005+02:00

Photo by Emily

One week till this...

2010-03-19T16:16:00.002+02:00

...I can't wait :o)

Maddi Maddi Maddi Maddi Song :o)

2010-03-12T22:57:00.003+02:00

Happy, Happy Birthay from Ukraine.

If you were here, this is what we would be doing.

a lesson in listening and letting go...

2010-03-07T13:12:00.004+02:00

The past several weeks I’ve been really restless. Tired of traveling. Wanting to just BE somewhere—anywhere, really. That is not like me. I love to travel. I love to be busy and on the go. Usually it energizes me. And it hasn’t been. Last week I even thought to myself, maybe it’s ‘cause I’m getting older…maybe I’m finally growing up—something I vowed long ago to never do.

I’ve been reading my Bible and spending time with God, but it’s felt distant and I don’t like it. I told him that and wrote it in my journal more than once this week. I asked him to show me what was wrong. That I wanted to make things right and I wanted to know that we were walking this together. That I was where he would have me to be.

This morning as I sat in my kitchen with my coffee and my Bible and read about Lydia taking in Paul and Silas and then how they were thrown in jail and then how the earthquake freed them, but they didn’t leave and how the guard came to know Christ through that and I began to think about how attentively they must have been listening to God. Because if I was in jail and an earthquake broke my chains, I think I’d take that as a sign from God to leave. And I thought “God, I want to hear Your voice above circumstance” and a whisper in my ear said “You did.” And I thought, “I know, God, that’s what I’m saying, I used to hear you so clearly. I used to know when to step and what to do and I wasn’t worried about what other people thought or even what it would mean for me personally. I heard and I listened and I followed and it was GOOD. What changed?” And my thoughts jumped back to the last thing I clearly heard, “move to Lugansk.” And then I heard his voice again, soft and gentle and clear, “Lori, you didn’t stop hearing. I didn’t stop speaking. You stopped listening.”

And he’s right of course. I heard Him. And I listened enough to share with a few friends and family members that I thought I would one day in the future be moving to Lugansk. Several of them confessed that they had seen that coming. Several circumstances began to make it clear that this was a pretty logical direction—needing to sell the apartment in Poltava, Shane and Marilyn’s sweet offer of a place to stay, relationships continuing to build with people there. And still I stayed.

See, I had plans here. Things I wanted to do first. I had had “vision” and I wasn’t done. What about the kids at the orphanage? What about my English students? (thoughts linger to the gospels and then man who was called by Jesus and said “ok, but first let me go burry my father” and then another man who said “ok, but first let me go tell my family goodbye.” That was exactly what I had been doing. I heard God and my answer was, “Yes, Lord, I will follow You, but first…”)

And besides, what are people going to think if I just jump up and run off to another city? But this morning as I cried and apologized for not jumping and running the second I heard his voice he reminded me that his ways are not my ways and his thoughts as so much higher than mine. And as he whispered his love I was reassured that his love for the people I was concerned for was far deeper than mine and who am I to think that he can’t take care of them without my being here? He is orchestrating a beautiful story and I see only a small piece of that. I am reminded that he is in control and that He is working all things together for His glory.

I don’t know what I missed out on by not moving to Lugansk sooner. And God is good and He has allowed me to be a part of things he is doing here in Poltava even in my disobedience. But I have heard his voice [again] and it’s time to let go of the things that are holding me here…

This time I’ve got to trust You,
I’ve got to accept Your plan.
I have tried to guide my circumstance,
But there’s just no way I can.

When will I learn this lesson?
Your ways are not like mine.
Lord, help me to surrender the control I try to have on my life.

When I let it go
You take my hand and gently lead me
Then you let me know
Just how peaceful my life can be
When I let it go
Your never ending blessings like a river start to flow
When I let it go

Too many times I’m searching
For the things I think I need
When I try to look for more
I always seem to give You less of me

Lord, help me gain the wisdom
My foolish mind still lacks
Till I find a way to let go of the part of me I’m holding back

When I let it go
You take my hand and gently lead me
Then you let me know
Just how peaceful my life can be
When I let it go
Your never ending blessings like a river start to flow
When I let it go

-Sierra

Starwars fun at home :o)

2010-03-05T21:13:00.001+02:00

I'm missing my Ukrainian family...

my "blurry world through sleepy eyes" adventure (#2)

2010-03-03T20:57:00.003+02:00

My first "blurry world through sleep eyes" adventure took place this January and also came about due to an early morning train arrival--it included dragging suitcases through snow and up 8 flights of stairs...but, this is not that story; this is adventure number two:

Ok, so I get back from Lugansk this morning. (great trip, by the way :o) Train arrives at 4:20 and is stopped at the "southern train station" I've never actually been to the southern train station except for on the train, but know that it's going to sit there for 30 min before traveling to the "Kyiv train station" that I've always used. I decide to get off here as opposed to sitting on the train for 30 mins + however long it takes to go between stations.(15-20 mins)

I start walking and decide that the dawn of morning is pretty and I'm going to walk a little while instead of take a taxi. It was awesome. I walked over this bridge before the sun was coming up and was just in awe. Snow is still on the ground and the street lights were reflecting off the river in the semidarkness. Very cool. I keep walking and thinking and talking to God, good times.

Then I get to a bus stop where there are people waiting and I think "Awesome, busses are starting to run and I won't have to get a taxi home." I stand and wait. Bus number 43 drives up. Awesome. This is the bus I take to the orphanage. I've never been to this end of the route, but I know that it goes by my stop on the other end. Perfect. We pile on. I pull out change to pay the conductor (money taker) but she doesn't come. Hmmm...that's odd. (note: marshrootkas in different cities take money differently...in Kyiv you pay when you get on, in Lugansk you pay when you get off, in Poltava you pay when the lady comes to get your money from you.) I look around. No one else seems concerned, so I decide to wait. We drive back through some really cool neighborhoods, more people get on. We go through the center, more people get on. I start to notice that no one is getting off. That's weird. But now we're on the part of the route that I recognize, so I'm not too concerned. Then we make a couple turns I don't remember.

Now we're in an area of town I don't know...no apartments, no stores, bad roads...uh-oh...where are we going?

The bus stops and everyone gets off--without paying...

I get off too. What else can I do. I walk around the bus and look to see where everyone is going. We are at the bus yard. I just took a workers marshootka to the marshootka yard. Haha. I watch the drivers and conductors greet each other and get ready for their day. I laugh to myself and think...hmmmm...can I figure out how to get back out of here? And start to walk.

I made it back to the main road and waited for a real marshootka to come by. It did. This time I asked, to be sure the driver was going where I wanted to then got on, paid, sat down, smiled and thought "only in Ukraine." I can't imagine my life without days like these :o)

Shaurma. Yum.

2010-02-26T15:51:00.001+02:00

A sweet, beautiful picture

2010-02-23T17:32:00.003+02:00

It's no secret that alcoholism is a huge problem in Ukraine. It saddens my heart to watch drunk men try to hold each other up as they stumble down the sidewalks or worse the intoxicated man who has fallen down in the cold without a friend and now can't seem to get back up and passersby stare but don't help. Sometimes the situation seems hopeless and statistics tell you things will get worse before they get better, but today a friend shared a story that encouraged me.

He called and said “Lori, today I saw a sweet, beautiful picture.” I waited for him to tell me of watching the sunrise over the Dnepr River or the way the rain had frozen on the trees and made everything sparkle. [both of which are beautiful pictures that God paints here in Ukraine] He continued, "I was in line to buy bread and the guy behind me...he's like a teenager, but tall. I don't know how old. And he asks to buy alcohol and the lady, the cashier, says ‘show me you identification, please.’ And he says ‘I don't have identification’ and she says ‘how old are you?’ and he says ‘18’ and she says ‘I need to see your id.’ Lori, I'm just so proud. It was so pretty, really. I have never seen this before. And I thought this never happens. It just made my day."

I have never seen a person carded in Ukraine for buying alcohol. I have a friend who tells me she’s been buying alcohol for her dad since she was eight years old and no one has ever questioned her. I thank God for the cashier in Kyiv who loved this young man enough to not sell him whatever he was attempting to purchase. I thank God for the pride she gave my friend for his country—someone enforcing GOOD laws. And I thank Him for the hope that he restored in me and the reminder that, as cheesy as it may sound, together we can make a difference. As the cashier enforces laws, as we obey them, as I tell my friends, as you pray, as they educate--God can [and will] use us to bring hope to the seemingly hopeless :o)

That IS a sweet, beautiful picture.

Playing Krokodil (Charades) in Novapavlovka

2010-02-19T15:33:00.002+02:00

Camp Friendship Fall Camp 2009

2009-11-18T12:54:00.002+02:00

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. If that is true then this video must be worth at least a billion. Tiffany came through Servant Life to Camp Friendship's fall camp in Lugansk region of Ukraine at the end of October. Here is a video she put together from her time here.

Begining to let myself think :o)

2009-10-19T15:41:00.002+03:00

I wish I didn’t hate making decisions so much.
I wish my coping mechanism wasn’t to close my eyes and pretend the world around me isn’t there.
I wish I could be everywhere at once.
I wish I could do everything.
I wish I could FIX everything.
I wish these valleys of calm and mountains of exploding life would balance themselves out a bit.
Is there always a right path and a wrong one?
Or sometimes are there two [or three or ten] rights and you just have to pick one?
Is one better and one best? Or are they of equal right?
How do you know which one to go down…
…when you’re not sure what’s God and what’s you?
And all your wisest consolers are giving you conflicting advice.
And so you pray. But you know that the decision to keep praying is one of those paths you were so unsure of—and is it the right one?
Cause to wait to decide is a decision in itself; and what if you wait too long?
Will you have missed it? Whatever it is.
Oh how I long to be sure.
So what do I KNOW? That I am HERE now. That I am called to LOVE now.

TODAY, Daddy; I will love the people I see today. And trust You with tomorrow.
Help me.
I do NOT know what I am doing. I do not know where you are leading, but I will TRUST in you.

“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God,
who gives generously to all without finding fault,
and it will be given to him.”
--James 1:5

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought,
and never fails to bear fruit.”
—Jeremiah 17:7-8

“The problem with Americans and tea parties is that they think the tea party is about the tea.” -A fellow Americrainian

2009-10-16T12:08:00.004+03:00

This is one cultural difference that can be counterproductive to effective ministry in Ukraine. In America, tea and coffee have begun to become somewhat of a fad during my lifetime with coffee franchises like Starbucks popping up on every corner, but in most Eastern countries tea is not a trend— it has been a vital part of the culture for as far back as these people can fathom.

Tea is the lifeblood that bonds us to each other.

The west is very much entertainment oriented. You see this in our schools, our homes and our churches. In schools, sporting events take huge priority. There are assemblies before big games, spirit weeks, and all sorts of activities going on—before the actual game even occurs. In our homes we have televisions and x-boxes and high-speed internet to keep us occupied. When looking for a church we want the most engaging preacher and the most compelling worship.

In Ukraine things are different. Schools don’t have sports teams. My Ukrainian friends may own a television, but certainly not an x-box and computers are a luxury—though becoming more and more accessible. And churches, though often hard to place, because a huge western influence in getting them started here, are often small, preaching is simple-but real, and music wise worship may be less than what we’ve come to expect, but it is no less genuine and I’ve no doubt God hears it and angels rejoice.

I’ve never been to a Ukrainian church that didn’t have tea before or after the service—if not both. I’ve never been in a Ukrainian home where tea was not offered. When I took Russian lessons, there was always tea/coffee breaks. Alina and I drink tea together everyday. At the orphanage this week it was a little girl’s birthday and we had tea and cookies to celebrate.

Tea is tradition; tea may be in response to the cold weather; tea heals all ailments.

But more than these things, tea is relationship.

And that is what we Americans often miss. When a Ukrainian offers to have tea with you, they are telling you that you are important to them. That they want to talk to you, to get to know you better, to be your friend. Don’t miss this.

I love this culture—I will not receive an invitation to go to the cinema and see the latest film; I will not receive an invitation to come over and play the latest wi game (unfortunately for me because I really want to play Beatles Rock Band); but I will get a phone call saying “Let’s have tea.” Or “let’s go for a walk.” I’ll take relationship over entertainment any day.

So the next time you get an invitation to have tea, remember—It’s not about the tea.

marshrootka musings...

2009-09-30T10:42:00.000+03:00

Yesterday I finished reading the book of Ezekiel and I just kept coming back to this one section. Several times throughout the book God tells Ezekiel to tell the people that He is going to do something for His Name’s sake, and in chapter 36 He expands on that and it says:

“Therefore say to the house of Israel, this is what the sovereign Lord says: It is not for your sake, O house of Israel, that I am going to do these things, but for the sake of my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations where you have gone. I will show the holiness of my great name which has been profaned among the nations, the name you have profaned among them. Then the nations will know that I am the Sovereign Lord, when I show myself holy through you before their eyes.”

Oh how I can relate to Israel. How many times have I not been Christ to the people around me? How many times have I been led by selfishness and not by love? And how inaccurate has my perception of salvation been?

“It is not for your sake, O Israel that I am going to do these things…”

“it is not for your sake, O Lori…”

“for the sake of my holy name…I will show the holiness of my great name…”

God will do what he purposes to do—show the glory of His Name.

The amazing thing is, he has chosen to do it through his people—even when we’ve profaned his name time and time again.

“Then the nations will know that I am the Sovereign Lord, when I show myself holy through you before their eyes.”

I am overwhelmed by this statement; especially in the context of the book of Ezekiel. God’s people had turned away from him as we all so often do. And still redemption is his heart SO THAT his glory may be seen and known.

Thank you, Daddy, for saving me; help me, everyday, to better understand what that means; to love as you love—for your name’s sake.

2009-09-11T10:25:00.002+03:00

The little girls (camp 1, I believe)

Photo courtesy Allison Jackson.

What four years will do...

2009-09-10T15:47:00.001+03:00

I am sitting at my desk eating borshch.

Remember when I though beets had to be disgusting?

I made it myself.

Remember when I didn’t cook?

I’m drinking carbonated water, wishing it was the strong carbonation and not just the slightly carbonated.

Remember when I thought fizzy water was gross?

Kvas now makes appearances in my diet, not frequently, but there have been moments of craving.

Remember when I didn’t even know what Kvas was?

I walk whenever possible and when not possible I take public transportation.

Remember when I never wanted to grow up, just be old enough to drive?

It’s more likely that you’ll find sour cream in my fridge than ketchup.

Remember when I was the ketchup queen and specifically ordered things without sour
cream?

I dreamed in Russian last night.

Remember when I was studying French in high school?

After 4 years, I finally made my way to a public pool.

Remember when I swam everyday?

Washing machines, dishwashers and microwaves are somewhere in my past (or at friends’ apartments :o)

I know some words in Russian that I have to think hard about to find in English—“икра,”
“тазик,” “зарядка.”

My blessing and my curse is that I am not who I was and not yet who I will be; I am caught somewhere in the middle of a paradox-al life.

I am American. And yet I am not.
I am not Ukrainian. And yet I am.

Home is where I am. And it is where I was. And it is where I am going.

I yearn for the past. I yearn for the future. I live in the moment.

I trust Christ more now than I ever have before. I have more questions now than I ever have before.

I love taking life one day at a time. I hate not knowing what’s next.

Wonder what the next four years hold…

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”
Jeremiah 29:11-14

Summer in the life of Lori: Part 2 (an overview)

2009-09-07T14:05:00.000+03:00

I have decided to give you the basics now and add some more specific stories later in the week.

When we left off I had spent one camp at Camp Friendship in Lugansk and then come back to Poltava for an orphan camp with Radooga. I said sad goodbyes to my Radooga friends and was really unsure of my decision/commitment to return to Camp Friendship; Radooga, though full of its own problems turned out to still be my comfort zone—I know what is needed and how to make it happen there. I spent one night at home and then got on a train back to Lugansk…

…I can’t really break the summer up, there’s just too much to tell. But to give you an overview, there were two more kids (ages 7-15) camps (each 15 days with a 5 day break between the two). Then the day after the last kids camp began youth (ages 15-25) camp (5 days).

All camps, I worked in the camp store. For kid’s camp 3 I was able to teach the older girls’ Bible Study as well. We talked a lot about the journey that is life. How long is a lifetime? What makes life count? When does life start? When does life end? What will Heaven be like? What is hell like? It was really awesome to use the Bible to help find the answers to some of these questions. Since camp ended I’ve been able to keep in contact with several of the girls from our class and hope to see them again in the future :o)

After camp 3 it was time for Allison to return home; we took a train to Kiev and spent the night with the Magdych’s. I was able to meet up with several friends and Allison did some souvenir shopping. The next day, I took her to the airport and then met up with some other American’s who had been with us at camps in Lugansk and had just arrived in Kiev that morning. We did the Kiev Tour and then I headed to the airport to fly back to Lugansk. It was my first “in county” flight. I told Magdych that I felt weird not taking the train, but I didn’t want to be away from camp any longer than necessary :o)

When I arrived back for youth camp, it was weird because the campers were already there and it was late at night and they were all out in the court yard hanging out and playing games. I went straight to bed and decided adjustment would happen best at the beginning of a new day and with a little sleep. It was a good decision.

I again worked the store and served as a ‘floating interpreter’ for youth camp. My Russian skills are not that good, but we had a lot of Americans and not so many interpreters and people were getting sick all camp, so everyone was helping everyone else out. As it should be :o) Youth camp was awesome and a lot of the boys who had been around for kids camp really started paying attention during youth camp and there were a lot of kids who asked for prayer, several who gave their lives to Christ and others who committed their lives to ministry in the future. God did things that only He can do and I love watching Him change lives. I am so blessed to be here; so blessed to get to see what He is doing.

After Youth Camp, I spent another week in Lugansk region hanging out, going with Shane and Terry to churches and visiting in villages and helping clean up from our camps and helping with logistical issues of other people renting the camp grounds.

Then I traveled with Shane and Terry and Alec and Yura to Kiev where I spent a week with the Magdychs—yay! I got to be with Magdych on his birthday; Emily flew in from 3 months in the states, so I got to pick her up from the airport and spend some time with her, took Yan to his first day of school, had coffee with Michelle, hung out with Yura before he started Bible College, met some Lviv-ians, and bought a new Russian text book, among other miscellaneous things :o)

Thursday I arrived back in Poltava and life here is already in full swing: I’ve been to the orphanage twice (and go back on Monday), I’ve had two English lessons with a sweet girl who wants to go to the states in December, am working on unpacking and doing laundry and getting my apartment back in order. Life is good. God is awesome. And I am looking forward to continuing with Him on this journey He has set before me :o)

More to come :o)

2009-09-02T10:14:00.003+03:00

I know I owe you all summer stories...and they will come. I am not home yet. When I get there I will update.

The Day I Almost Cost A Teller Her Job

2009-09-02T10:14:00.001+03:00

I needed to pay my rent, and wanted to do it in dollars, so instead of going to an ATM (more fondly known as "bank-o-mat") I decided to take an attempt at going inside and getting money off my debit card through a teller. I walked up to the counter and asked if this was possible (some banks here will let you and others won't). She took my card and began the transaction. When it got time to inspect my passport, the confusion started. I could tell she was having trouble reading it so I offered to show her the information she needed.

"Your last name is Amber?" she asked.
"No, my last name is Jackson."
"First name?"
"Lori."
"Ochestva?" (a form of your father's fist name, used for identification in Ukraine and other former soviet countries)
"We don't have Ochestvi. My middle name is Amber."
very confused look.
"You can type it there, where the ochestva should go, or you can just leave that blank. They know Americans don't have ochestvi."
"Birthday."
"3 April 1983"
"what is this?" (pointing on my passport to the city Charleston)
"that's where my passport was printed. It's not important."
(and so on and so forth)

I sign a bunch of receipts and write my cell phone number on the back of one of her copies at the last minute. She returns my card and passport (since that time the embassy lost my passport, I'm paranoid about handing anyone anything of such value and and watch it like a hawk.)

An hour later I've made it to Emily's apartment. We're going out later to meet our friend Michelle. Sitting on her piano bench my phone rings. I answer it and on the other end is the lady from the bank in a panic.

"I need you to come back as soon as possible."
"I'm busy right now. Can I come by in the morning"
"I need you to come right now?"
"what's the problem?"
"there was a mistake."
"What time do you close?"
"In 30 mins."
"there is no way I can make it back in 30 mins. What time do you open in the morning? Can I come by then?"
"What if I call a cab for you? We need to close out for the day and I really need you to come back."
"A taxi won't help me get there within 30 mins. There is a traffic jam. Can I come tomorrow?"
"I'll stay here until you can get here. Anytime tonight. If you don't come tonight, I won't have a job in the morning."
"ok, I'm on my way."

Emily and I call Michelle to say we'll be late. Get on a marshrootka and head back to the bank to see what the problem is.

She had charged my card wrong. We redid the transaction. Signed a bunch more receipts, and as I began to walk away she thanks me profusely and insists I take a box of chocolates.

Only in Ukraine :o)

Summer in the life of Lori: Part 1

2009-07-06T16:40:00.000+03:00

To sum up the first half of my summer wouldn’t fit in a hundred books.

The past year has been about me taking life one day at a time and though for most of the world that’s not an option—we’re so focused on the future and “what’s next” the world won’t let us close our eyes to tomorrow long enough to live in today. At the same time, tomorrow may never come so living today is of utmost importance.

I don’t often like living “one day at a time.” I want answers when people ask me what the future looks like. But the only real answer I have is “I have no idea.” And really that’s the only honest answer any of us have. In America this spring, it was hard not having answers about my future or even my summer for all the people asking. But looking back, it doesn’t matter. I don’t need the answers; I need to live by faith and not by sight. I need to trust that He who wrote every day of my life before I was even born will lead me as I trust in him. And if I’d seen the future before I got to it, I may have turned and run from it. Because life isn’t always easy and I don’t always want to deal with the things that come up on this road I’m walking. And yet, I press on.

I’m pretty sure every summer turns into “the hardest summer yet.” And I’m already ready to say that about this one and it’s still coming at me full force. When will you sleep, when will you rest? My mom and close friends keep asking. When He provides it. I trust Him to know when I need it; I trust Him to be my strength when I shouldn’t have any. Today He has given me a day of rest. A day at home between camps to spend with Him and to be alone. The first in a long time. But I wouldn’t trade a day of what has been until now. And when I get on the train tonight, I don’t know what will be waiting for me tomorrow or for how long but I’ll continue to take it one day at a time; one step and then the next.

All that to say, that I can’t tell you what tomorrow holds, but I would love to share what’s been going on before that…

My summer began with the arrival of a friend and ex-summer staffer, Allison Jackson. She and I toured both Kiev and Poltava and then headed to Lugansk where she is summer staffing this year. I had intended to just drop her off and come back to Poltava, but Allison and the Dukes encouraged me to stay. And being that I knew several people coming for the first camp, I decided to stick around.

Camp Friendship is awesome :o) The kids are great, the Ukrainian staff worked really hard and the American team was well prepared and everyone had a lot of fun. The village of Novapavlaka where the camp is located is beautiful. I loved getting to hang out with the kids and they were all really encouraging about my Russian skills :o) I mostly worked in the camp store which was a really good fit for me—I got to use my administrative skills as well as interact with just about everyone at the camp on a daily basis. My favorite were the kids who would just come in to hang out and talk to me while I was there :o)

Sadly, two days before the end of camp 1 at camp friendship, I got on a train headed to Poltava where I had agreed to help Radooga. Radooga Poltava camp was also awesome. It was really good for me to spend a whole week—day in and day out—with the kids from the orphanage here. It helped to build and solidify relationships that had begun from my visits to the orphanage in Poltava. Oksana Magdych and I spent the week with the 12 and 13 year olds and they are amazing. Each one of them is so talented and beautiful. When the week ended and camp was over it was really hard to leave. I just kept thinking about how many people have come into the lives of these kids and after some time passes they’ve left. Oksana and I talked with them a lot about friendship—about needing each other and about Christ being the best friend and God always ready to listen. A huge part of me wanted to just throw the rest of the summer out the window and stay at Camp Mayak with them. I’m glad I get to come back in the fall and be with them again.

Today I am home. I paid my bills and checked my emails and now I’m packing again. Summer Part 2 begins tonight at 11:30 when my train leaves for Lugansk. I’m excited to get back there and see what God has for tomorrow and tomorrow and the day after that. I’m rested and ready for the next step—even if I can’t see where it’s leading, I know who’s hand I’m holding and I’m certain that He won’t let go :o)

Glory to His Name

2009-05-13T20:51:00.004+03:00

Sleeping during a thunderstorm, waking up to sunshine. It was a good night.

I am home. And it is good.

I'm working on finding my place again...getting back into life here. I feel like most of my life is spent doing this.

But coming home tonight I was reminded, once again, of how blessed I am to be here. What an honor it is to spend time with each person God brings into my day. I'm learning to be more aware of each of them--the email from Magdych, the facebook message from America, the lady across the hall who walks out her door when I'm walking out mine, the taxi driver, the American family who's here adopting, the kids at the orphanage, the lady behind the counter in the minimarket, the old men playing chess downstairs, the youth from church who randomly knock on my door, the phone call from Michelle, the SMS from Dennis, the smile from the kids outside as I walk by...God may I constantly be reminded that you have a plan for each of these moments. May I spend every second, every breath, every word, every gesture with you so that I might fade into the background of all these encounters and You will be what is remembered. Help me to bring glory to Your Name.

Through Em's Eyes

2009-04-30T11:17:00.002+03:00

My friend Emily recently wrote the follow post after a God-moment we shared the other day in McDonald's:

God's Timing is Perfect

By Emmychka

Lori on Thursday invited me to meet her and hang out where she was staying. I jumped at this opportunity and headed out to the bus stop. Well come to find out on the way there, the people she is staying with just weren't home, so she suggested we go to McDonald's instead. So there we were at McDonald's discussing this and that, laughing at nothing in particular when a boy, appeared at our table as if out of thin air.

Now this boy was caked, I mean caked, in dirt. He was so sheepish and wouldn't look Lori or I in the eye as he softly mumbled out his desire for some money so he could buy food. He gave the impression that he knew he was less of a person than Lori and I was. I asked him what he wanted. He looked at me like I had three heads, so I repeated my question.

He just sheepishly smiled and replied, "Just a cola would be fine."

After I made sure he was sitting down and wouldn't go anywhere, I bought him dinner. Lori and I talked to him, trying to find out about him and subtly probing how such an innocent boy ended up on the streets. He wouldn't disclose much except that his name was Vlad, he was in his fifth year of college (not really, he didn't look older than 9) and lived with his friend Dima, not in Kyiv, he said, but on the street.

The cutest part of the whole ordeal was when I asked Vlad if Dima had eaten and Vlad immediately took a napkin and covered his ice cream sundae and said he would take that to Dima. I said it wasn't necessary and bought dinner for Vlad to carry to Dima. I told Vlad that this was all just a gift from God. Vlad's response was, "I know" and he smiled so big.

He honored us and showed us where he lived, didn't take us into the abandoned building, but showed us where it is. I want to go back before I head off to the states and bring him some bread, meat and cheese. It's so sad that someone so innocent and young is living on the streets, fending for himself and without parents to take care of him. I don't know his story, but I know that our Creator loves him.

Please pray for Vlad and Dima. I mean, I know that doesn't fix their situation, but pray that they would be open to me ministering to them. Pray that I will have the grace to love on them how they need and would be able to touch their lives as God would want, not how I think I should.

If the people Lori has been staying with had been home, we never would've met and been able to minister to this young child. That's just nothing short of God's miraculous and perfect timing. For Lori and I at first we were a bit frustrated and feeling inconvenienced, but at the end of the night we both just knew that this was the better way. God always does know best.

Check out other awesome posts by Emily here.

Life Skills Curriculum Training: Day 4

2009-04-30T10:56:00.001+03:00

Today was “practice what you’ve learned day” and we were broken into groups to present a lesson to the rest of the class. My group was a 20 year old, enthusiastic, super sweet girl named Nastya from Dnipropetrovsk, an awesome lady named Lena who became friends with a young pregnant girl from an orphanage in her city and through her began getting connected in other ways there and myself. Our topic was “the intellectual sphere of personality” and we talked about how what you hear about yourself affects what you think about yourself and how important it is to know what God thinks about all people and to speak His words to both yourself and others so that you are hearing and thus feeding your brain Truth.

Life Skills Curriculum Training: Day 3

2009-04-30T10:55:00.001+03:00

You Tallahassians would not believe the traffic jam I sat (or rather stood being that there were no seats left by the time I got on the bus) in this morning on my way to training. But in a city of 6 million, traffic can get a bit ridiculous.

Today we went through several of the lessons in the book we received including relational styles, life is not a game and sex and relationships.

Life Skills Curriculum Training: Day 2

2009-04-30T10:54:00.000+03:00

Today has been much more Informational and less of the game playing that occurred most of the day yesterday has repeated today—a plus in my book, but I know not everyone’s, so maybe this training will be well balanced and keep us all happy.

Today I’ve been talking to a guy named Vladimir who serves at an orphanage in Zaporozhzhia. He’s only been there about a year (similar to myself) and it is really great to hear about what God is doing in other orphanages and other cities.

Please pray for those of us going through this course. Pray that we would constantly be seeking Christ in the ministries that He has called us to. And that we would always remember that the only thing we have to give is Him. And pray that the Holy Spirit would work through us to bring hope and change lives—because only He can.

Life Skills Curriculum Training: Day 1

2009-04-25T15:24:00.000+03:00

Only in Ukraine could I be 30 minutes late for a meeting and receive a prize for being one of the first to arrive.

It was AWESOME to be in a room full of Ukrainians who share my heart for both youth and orphans. It was AWESOME to hear their stories about “their kids.” It was AWESOME to be reminded that we are in this together and that together we are making a difference.

I am working on my homework (which is all in Russian) and am excited about tomorrow when we will actually begin looking at the curriculum.

At the beginning of the class this morning Isaiah 55 was read. This chapter was read to me by a friend my very first week in Ukraine and was reread the week I was called to move to Poltava; hearing it again this morning reminded me that God is always doing something. His word will not return void! :o)

Tough Stuff

2009-02-08T19:21:00.000+02:00

I got a new Bible the other day and decided to start and the beginning and read straight through. But for the past couple days I have been putting off reading it…because I know what happens next. See, Isaac was just born and then a treaty was made with Abimelech…and I know what’s coming and I just haven’t been able to read it. I told myself just to read it today and be done with it. Sometimes when I read this story it is a beautiful picture and I love it…I can see the foreshadowing of the story of my savior as God calls Abraham to sacrifice his son. And other times, times like this week, I just don’t want to hear God ask Abraham to do something so unfathomable. And yet I know that because Abraham knows that God is holy he obeys and because God is love He provides. But it’s not like Abraham just woke up one morning and took Isaac up on the hill because God said to. No, it was a process…three days he journeyed with Isaac knowing what was coming. His son asked him about the lamb for a sacrifice…and Abraham had to answer. Don’t tell me God doesn’t call us to hard things. Don’t tell me “become a Christian and all your problems will be solved.” Abraham’s predicament came about because he knew God. I do believe that knowing Christ and obeying God are worth every moment of sacrifice to which we are called…but so often, and even today, it’s hard for me to understand the ‘why’ behind the calling. Why would God ask Abraham to sacrifice his son; he already knew he would. Sometimes I wonder if it wasn’t for Abraham’s benefit—and for ours—that he was called to do this. That Abraham might better see the depth of his love for the God who had given him everything and that we might see an example of hard-core faith and be challenged to live out the depth of that obedience to our King.

Wake up little Isaac, rub your tired eyes
Go and kiss your mamma we’ll be gone a little while
Come and walk beside me
Come and hold your papa’s hand
I go to make an alter and to offer up my lamb

I waited on the Lord and in a waking dream he came
Riding on a wind across the sand he spoke my name
Here I am I whispered as I waited in the dark
And the answer was a sword that came down hard upon my heart.

Holy is the Lord
Holy is the Lord
And the Lord I will obey
Lord, help me I don’t know the way.

So take me to the mountain
I will follow where you lead
There I’ll lay the body of the boy you gave to me
And even though you take him, still I ever will obey
Maker of this mountain, please, make another way.

From Mom's visit :o)

2009-02-07T00:00:00.001+02:00

About Me

2009-01-20T13:44:00.000+02:00

I am: authentic
I think: people are worth it--whatever ‘it’ happens to be.
I know: God and my mom will always love me.
I want: to go on a road trip with Calyn to Georgia—the country, not the state.
I wish: to perfect my teleportation skills
I hate: hypocrisy
I miss: my best friend, my little white truck, my ability to never sleep and wearing flip-flops year round.
I fear: failure and disappointing others.
I feel: like it has been way too long since I have seen ‘my kids.’
I hear: snow melting and dripping down my balcony, remont next door and Sarah McLachlan singing Ice Cream.
I smell: coffee wafting from the cup next to me.
I crave: Chinese food…
I search: for Dr. Pepper at the store downtown
I wonder: if the dream I’m dreaming will really become reality one day; in some ways it already has.
I regret: not talking to people.
I love: living in a mix of two cultures and sharing the best of both with people who’ve only known one or the other.
I ache: when I see others hurting.
I care: about the outcast.
I always: hope.
I am not: a good speller—in English or Russian.
I believe: in people that the world has given up on.
I dance: in the kitchen with my dad and in my foyer all alone.
I sing: in my head constantly.
I cry: at every airport departure.
I don't always: know what day it is.
I fight: with Ilya Magdych and love it.
I write: less frequently than I used to; less frequently than I’d like to.
I win: very rarely; but at least now I play.
I never: know where life will lead me next.
I confuse: cases in Russian far more frequently than I’d like.
I can usually be found: in the background.
I am scared: I’ll never get married.
I need: Christ. Always—every day, hour, min, sec.
I am happy: when I am with friends.
I hope: [точка]
I am tagging: no one.

Written on Dec. 21, 2008

2009-01-17T18:36:00.001+02:00

Last night I went with Oleg and Oksana Magdych downtown to see the Christmas tree. Oleg’s parents went with us and sitting in the backseat of the car, I couldn’t help but reminisce about Christmas’ past and other “light looking adventures.”

Getting all of us in the car to look at Christmas lights looks something like this…
In America
Calyn and Lori: YAY Christmas
Chris: It’s tradition. We’re going to look at lights.
Cameron: Fine, I’ll go, but I can’t promise to stay awake.
All of us: Dave is not driving.
In Ukraine
Ilya has to stay home to study.
Yan has a temperature and will stay home.
Magdych is trying to rush us all out the door.
A fiasco of jackets and hats and gloves and scarves and boots not necessary in Florida begins.

As we drive down the road…
In America
We flip between Christmas stations because the traditional Jesus themed songs are hard to find.
We mosey through the neighborhoods with the good lights…looking for our favorites.
Cameron falls asleep.
In Ukraine
Whatever station we are listening to begins playing the chicken dance in Russian. Oksana and I dance in the back seat.
We speed down the road dodging other cars across the icy road.
Until we get downtown there are no lights to be found.
Oleg’s mom tells me that I need to learn Ukrainian.

When we find the lights we’re looking for…
In America
We ooo and awe and then head home for hot chocolate (or in my case, instant cappuccino)
In Ukraine
We park the car and walk under the street to get closer to the tree.
There is a giant (really awesome) fireworks show.
We take pictures by the tree.
We fight our way out of the crowd of people back to the car.
Oleg’s mom is sad that we took her away from the giant tree so soon.
We head home for hot tea and an episode of 24.

I am going to miss Christmas with the Rebers this year. I am very grateful for the Magdychs (as I type this Yan and Magdych are making an angel tree topper). And the best of all is that mom will be here on Friday!

2008-12-19T14:24:00.001+02:00

From snow in Kiev to summer in Egypt and back again. I had a great week with the Magdych family and their friend Vika! Now, if there were just a way to get my mom here faster...

2008-12-12T08:51:00.002+02:00

Saying goodbye is never easy, but I was glad to get to see Bob and JoAnn before they headed back to the states. They were a blessing to me and many others during thier time in Kiev. I am excited for the new things God is leading them to.

Happy Birthday, Taylor!

2008-12-06T15:25:00.003+02:00

Ok, so I know "Fotka Friday" was yesterday, but I needed to give a happy birthday shout out to one of the coolest people I know.

Taylor Phelan is one of the most real and honest Christians I have ever met. I appreciate this so much and am so stoked to see what God is doing through him because of that.

Tay, you rock!

2008-12-05T15:19:00.002+02:00

A lot to be thankful for

2008-12-04T17:34:00.000+02:00

So much to tell…

Thanksgiving weekend was great. I headed to Kiev on Wednesday and helped Emily bake a couple of pies and then got a call from Magdych inviting me to come to a mini leadership conference led by Page from Chick Fil A corporate. I was glad to hear someone preaching the benefits of Christian business principles to a room full of up and coming Ukrainian leaders including the president of a PR company in Kiev. And Page wasn’t just preaching it, he was showing how it had been put into practice and is reaping rewards for Chick Fil A. That was exciting.

Thursday was a Thanksgiving Fiesta as we had all sorts of Mexican food—tacos, enchiladas, refried beans, Spanish rice, salsa and Mexican lasagna—yum! Not to mention all the great people who showed up to share in the food and fun. I think there were about 14 of us in shifts throughout the day.

Friday I got to spend time in a quiet coffee shop talking with friends about the vision God is growing in me for ministry in Poltava. It was good to hear their perspectives, ideas, contact thoughts and just shared hearts for the people of Ukraine.

Saturday, I was going to meet Katia’s sister to pick up some things for her. (She is in Poltava interpreting for the Hall family who is here adopting). At a crosswalk, someone in a car starts shouting my name. Turns out the Magdychs were headed to hang a banner and invited me to join them. When we got to Bucha, I asked what was going on that we needed to hang the banner for. Magdych told me that Sergey Zychinko’s church and Almaz were having a youth conference. I laughed and said, Andrey totally invited me to come to this conference! It was GREAT to see Sverchkov and talk to him while Radooga passed out flyers and such for camps and conferences.

Sunday, I went to KIBC and got to see Bob and JoAnn for one last time before they head to the states. So many unexpected surprises this weekend! Then Emily and I headed to the Magdychs for Thanksgiving number two. It was so much fun to hang out with Oleg and Oksana, Oksana’s mom and sister and, of course, Yan and Ilya. Come to find out, Vika, Oksana’s sister used to go to KIBC. Small world. I spent the night with the Magdych’s and Oksana and I giggled and chatted like teenage girls at a slumber party.

Did I mention I had fun this weekend?

But, as always, it is great to be home.

Yesterday, I visited the orphanage with the Halls and then got to spend time with their family and Katia and David. Katia and I had a blast playing charades (crokidil in Russian) with the kids. The highlight of the game being when Vanya was acting out “dwarf.” He got so frustrated that no one was guessing it he started yelling things in Russian, but being that it was Hallie and Kristina trying to guess it wasn’t helping them. Katia and I were both rolling on the floor laughing so hard we were crying. It was great.

Pray that all continues to go smoothly for the Hall family as they move forward in the adoption process. God is building families in a way only he could and it is such a joy for me to see him do it!

2008-11-28T17:49:00.001+02:00

We had a Thanksgiving Fiesta with lots of friends and food.

Feeling called forward, I take comfort in the fact that I do not ever walk alone.

2008-11-22T17:34:00.001+02:00

"In Me"

If you ask me to leap
Out of my boat on the crashing waves
If You ask me to go
Preach to the lost world that Jesus saves

I'll go, but I cannot go alone
Cause I know I'm nothing on my own
But the power of Christ in me makes me strong
Makes me strong

Cause when I'm weak, You make me strong
When I'm blind, You shine Your light on me
Cause I'll never get by living on my own ability
How refreshing to know You don't need me
How amazing to find that you want me
So I'll stand on Your truth, and I'll fight with Your strength
Until You bring the victory, by the power of Christ in me

If You ask me to run
And carry Your light into foreign land
If You ask me to fight
Deliver Your people from Satan's hand

To reach out with Your hands
To learn through Your eyes
To love with the love of a savior
To feel with Your heart
And to think with Your mind
I'd give my last breath for Your glory

-Casting Crowns

2008-11-21T14:13:00.000+02:00

The American Team and kids that I got to serve with two weeks ago.

Christmas came early...and arrives one day late :o)

2008-11-19T14:51:00.001+02:00

My mom bought a plane ticket yesterday.
She will arrive in Kiev on Dec. 26th.
I can't wait.

Isaiah Insights

2008-11-18T19:39:00.002+02:00

"As the rain and soil come down from heaven and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flurish so that it yeilds seed for the sower and bread for the eater. So is my word that goes out from my mouth. It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:10-11

"For as the soil makes the sprout come up and a garden causes seeds to grow, so the Soverign Lord will make righteousness and praise spring up before all nations." Isaiah 61:11

A Story of Eternal Perspective

2008-11-14T12:20:00.002+02:00

My mom sent me an e-mail this week with a link to the following post. I couldn't help but share:

A Story of Eternal Perspective
Posted in: True Stories
By Aggie Hurst

Back in 1921, a missionary couple named David and Svea Flood went with their two-year-old son from Sweden to the heart of Africa—to what was then called the Belgian Congo. They met up with another young Scandinavian couple, the Ericksons, and the four of them sought God for direction. In those days of much tenderness and devotion and sacrifice, they felt led of the Lord to go out from the main mission station and take the gospel to a remote area.

This was a huge step of faith. At the village of N'dolera they were rebuffed by the chief, who would not let them enter his town for fear of alienating the local gods. The two couples opted to go half a mile up the slope and build their own mud huts.

They prayed for a spiritual breakthrough, but there was none. The only contact with the villagers was a young boy, who was allowed to sell them chickens and eggs twice a week. Svea Flood—a tiny woman of only four feet, eight inches tall—decided that if this was the only African she could talk to, she would try to lead the boy to Jesus. And in fact, she succeeded.

But there were no other encouragements. Meanwhile, malaria continued to strike one member of the little band after another. In time the Ericksons decided they had had enough suffering and left to return to the central mission station. David and Svea Flood remained near N'dolera to go on alone.

Then, of all things, Svea found herself pregnant in the middle of the primitive wilderness. When the time came for her to give birth, the village chief softened enough to allow a midwife to help her. A little girl was born, whom they named Aina.

The delivery, however, was exhausting, and Svea Flood was already weak from bouts of malaria. The birth process was a heavy blow to her stamina. She lasted only another seventeen days.

Inside David Flood, something snapped in that moment. He dug a crude grave, buried his twenty-seven-year-old wife, and then took his children back down the mountain to the mission station. Giving his newborn daughter to the Ericksons, he snarled, "I'm going back to Sweden. I've lost my wife, and I obviously can't take care of this baby. God has ruined my life." With that, he headed for the port, rejecting not only his calling, but God himself.

Within eight months both the Ericksons were stricken with a mysterious malady and died within days of each other. The baby was then turned over to some American missionaries, who adjusted her Swedish name to "Aggie" and eventually brought her back to the United States at age three.

This family loved the little girl and was afraid that if they tried to return to Africa, some legal obstacle might separate her from them. So they decided to stay in their home country and switch from missionary work to pastoral ministry. And that is how Aggie grew up in South Dakota. As a young woman, she attended North Central Bible college in Minneapolis. There she met and married a young man named Dewey Hurst.

Years passed. The Hursts enjoyed a fruitful ministry. Aggie gave birth first to a daughter, then a son. In time her husband became president of a Christian college in the Seattle area, and Aggie was intrigued to find so much Scandinavian heritage there.

One day a Swedish religious magazine appeared in her mailbox. She had no idea who had sent it, and of course she couldn't read the words. But as she turned the pages, all of a sudden a photo stopped her cold. There in a primitive setting was a grave with a white cross-and on the cross were the words SVEA FLOOD.

Aggie jumped in her car and went straight to a college faculty member who, she knew, could translate the article. "What does this say?" she demanded.

The instructor summarized the story: It was about missionaries who had come to N'dolera long ago...the birth of a white baby...the death of the young mother...the one little African boy who had been led to Christ...and how, after the whites had all left, the boy had grown up and finally persuaded the chief to let him build a school in the village. The article said that gradually he won all his students to Christ...the children led their parents to Christ...even the chief had become a Christian. Today there were six hundred Christian believers in that one village...

All because of the sacrifice of David and Svea Flood.

For the Hursts' twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, the college presented them with the gift of a vacation to Sweden. There Aggie sought to find her real father. An old man now, David Flood had remarried, fathered four more children, and generally dissipated his life with alcohol. He had recently suffered a stroke. Still bitter, he had one rule in his family: "Never mention the name of God-because God took everything from me."

After an emotional reunion with her half brothers and half sister, Aggie brought up the subject of seeing her father. The others hesitated. "You can talk to him," they replied, "even though he's very ill now. But you need to know that whenever he hears the name of God, he flies into a rage."

Aggie was not to be deterred. She walked into the squalid apartment, with liquor bottles everywhere, and approached the seventy-three-year-old man lying in a rumpled bed.

"Papa?" she said tentatively.

He turned and began to cry. "Aina," he said, "I never meant to give you away."

"It's all right Papa," she replied, taking him gently in her arms. "God took care of me."

The man instantly stiffened. The tears stopped.

"God forgot all of us. Our lives have been like this because of Him." He turned his face back to the wall.

Aggie stroked his face and then continued, undaunted.

"Papa, I've got a little story to tell you, and it's a true one. You didn't go to Africa in vain. Mama didn't die in vain. The little boy you won to the Lord grew up to win that whole village to Jesus Christ. The one seed you planted just kept growing and growing. Today there are six hundred African people serving the Lord because you were faithful to the call of God in your life...

"Papa, Jesus loves you. He has never hated you."

The old man turned back to look into his daughter's eyes. His body relaxed. He began to talk. And by the end of the afternoon, he had come back to the God he had resented for so many decades.

Over the next few days, father and daughter enjoyed warm moments together. Aggie and her husband soon had to return to America—and within a few weeks, David Flood had gone into eternity.

A few years later, the Hursts were attending a high-level evangelism conference in London, England, where a report was given from the nation of Zaire (the former Belgian Congo). The superintendent of the national church, representing some 110,000 baptized believers, spoke eloquently of the gospel's spread in his nation. Aggie could not help going to ask him afterward if he had ever heard of David and Svea Flood.

"Yes, madam," the man replied in French, his words then being translated into English. "It was Svea Flood who led me to Jesus Christ. I was the boy who brought food to your parents before you were born. In fact, to this day your mother's grave and her memory are honored by all of us."

He embraced her in a long, sobbing hug. Then he continued, "You must come to Africa to see, because your mother is the most famous person in our history."

In time that is exactly what Aggie Hurst and her husband did. They were welcomed by cheering throngs of villagers. She even met the man who had been hired by her father many years before to carry her back down the mountain in a hammock-cradle.

The most dramatic moment, of course, was when the pastor escorted Aggie to see her mother's white cross for herself. She knelt in the soil to pray and give thanks. Later that day, in the church, the pastor read from John 12:24: "I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." He then followed with Psalm 126:5: "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy."

(An excerpt from Aggie Hurst, Aggie: The Inspiring Story of A Girl Without A Country [Springfield, MO: Gospel Publishing House, 1986].)

Permissions: Feel free to reproduce and distribute any articles written by Randy Alcorn, in part or in whole, in any format, provided that you do not alter the wording in any way or charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. It is our desire to spread this information, not protect or restrict it.

Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: by Randy Alcorn, Eternal Perspective Ministries, 39085 Pioneer Blvd., Suite 206, Sandy, OR 97055, 503-668-5200, www.epm.org, www.randyalcorn.blogspot.com

2008-11-14T11:25:00.002+02:00

Making cross necklaces last week with the kids at orphanage number 4 in Zhitomir.

Picture Post

2008-11-07T12:28:00.004+02:00

Hey all! This is Emily, subbing for Lori as she has no internet access at the moment. This picture was taken by the lovely Michelle on our recent trip to Budapest. This picture is awesome because we all agreed this statue looked like Peter Pan and Lori suffers considerably from Peter Pan syndrome. Not to mention he is one of her favorite fictional characters.

Pray for Lori as she is with Americans helping them through adoption things. I'm sure she'll write an update when she has a chance. Blessings!

2008-10-31T07:46:00.002+02:00

Picture taken at Time to Change youth party yesterday

Lessons from the campfire:

2008-10-28T16:04:00.001+02:00

Last night we had a cookout; it was a lot of fun—roasting sausages, singing songs, climbing trees, telling stories. As the evening began to wind down and people started breaking into smaller groups to say their goodbyes, I sat watching the fire. And, as people began to leave, things we thrown into the fire—napkins, food that had fallen on the ground, now empty two liters. I watched the trash melt and begin to deform and eventually disappear completely. I started thinking about that part in Hebrews that speaks of God being a ‘consuming fire.’ Later this week I’ll probably look that part up again and read what is really written there; but for me, last night, it was all about me wanting to step into the fire that is my God and melt away until the only evidence of my previous existence is Him. I want to be consumed. :o)

Started rubbing sticks together
Thought a spark would take forever
Never dreamt this fire would appear
Moses saw the bush in flames
Heard the branches speak his name
Wonder if he felt this kind of fear

Cause I’m burning
I’m burning
And I know I’m gonna blister in these flames
I’ll stay here
Until this smoke clears
And I’ll find you in the ashes that remain

Used to be that I could say
My faith was one arms length away
From any flame that felt to warm
As for matches
I received a gallon full of gasoline
And now my cozy campfire days are gone

Now I’m burning
I’m burning
And I know I’m gonna blister in these flames
I’ll stay here
Until this smoke clears
And I’ll find you in the ashes that remain

“Knock with caution at the door.”
They said, “Beware of what you’re praying for.”
So I stand with my whole desire
In the middle of this forest fire
Till I’ve nothing left to show
And new life begins to grow

Cause I’m burning
I’m burning
And I know I’m gonna blister in these flames
I’ll stay here
Until this smoke clears
And I’ll find you in the ashes that remain

-Nichole Nordeman, Burnin'

Welcome to...

2008-10-24T12:30:00.006+03:00

I love fall...

Flirting with sin...

2008-10-22T15:11:00.004+03:00

is always disastrous.

If there is line where purity ceases and sin begins then my goal is not to not cross that line, my goal is to be as far away from that line as possible.

Oh, believe me, that’s a lot easier said than done. And I’ve crossed the line far more often than I’d like to admit. But knowing that the call of my God is holiness, my standard for myself must be nothing less than that.

“But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: ‘Be holy because I am holy.’” 1 Peter 1:15-16

I acted out this idea in my friend’s kitchen the other day…using Giglio’s bubble analogy-- getting just close enough to the outer edge of a bubble so as not to pop it rather than rushing to the middle where God and holiness resided. She encouraged me to illustrate and post this idea on my blog. Being that I am a better actor than I am illustrator I shrugged her off. But, as I’ve noticed sin in my own life this past week and looked back to see how I got to the action of the sin, I realized it always began in a form of pride and/or selfishness. I stepped into a grey area sure that I wouldn’t cross over into the dark.

Take David for example, I don’t believe he woke up one morning and thought “I’d like to commit adultery today. And then I’ll have the husband killed” and so he went looking for Bathsheba. No, note that already he was not in the battle that was being fought—a place the king should have been. I don’t really know why he wasn’t there. But I’d wager that his decision to not be there was a step into the grey, opening the door for sin later. Had he been at the battle, he would not have been in a place to view Bathsheba. Had he not seen her, he would not have desired her. Had he not desired her he would not have slept with her, she would not have gotten pregnant, he would not have tried to deceive her husband, he would not have murdered Uriah. And all this because David, like me, chose to flirt with sin, pridefully believing “oh, I would never do something like that.” Forget the line, I’ll do my best to keep out of the grey, thank you very much! :o)

Still learning to pray :o)

2008-09-15T17:24:00.000+03:00

I was talking to a friend last night about prayer; and how hard it is sometimes. We both agreed that in a lot of instances the reason we don’t pray is because we don’t really expect God to do anything about it. I know that must sound terrible to those of you reading, but maybe, just maybe, you too have felt this way. It’s not that I doubt God’s ability to do something. I am well aware that my God is the creator of the universe and the savior of the world. He can do anything. What I doubt is that my prayer matters. Oh, I don’t think “my prayer doesn’t matter to God.” There are plenty of scriptures that dispute this fact. (Deut. 4:7 says he’s near us when we pray; 2 Ch 7:15 says he sees and hears our prayers; Rom. 8:26 says he helps us to pray; and most pertinent to my current problem, Matthew 21:22 says “If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in my name.”) But my failure to pray for certain things demonstrates this belief--or perhaps more accurately, my lack of faith.

Please do not read this post wrong. I am not depressed or in a bad place spiritually. Quite the opposite, I am loving getting to know my Savior better and I am excited about the place He has brought me to share his love.

Before I moved to Poltava, it was a dream. And therefore, anything was possible. And I could see it so clearly. I knew my future was here. Now I have arrived and that is incredible in and of itself; but, it has caused perspective to change. The dream has become a reality. Stepping into reality, those endless possibilities have become hazy as I search for the path I once saw so clearly.

It’s like when you look down on a city from an airplane. You can see how all the roads connect and understand the info structure of the city, but when you land, and need to find a certain road or building or park or whatever, you’re not sure how to get there. From the air you could see it, but now you’re surrounded by the unknown and are unsure which way to go. You need a map :o)

My map, thus far, on my journey, has only ever been truly illuminated by the light of scripture and prayer. And so despite my fears of inadequacy or unworthiness (both of which I am and am not. Scripture tells me that it is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me.) I continue to pray…

Trusting.

2008-09-10T14:38:00.000+03:00

Keeping with the Egypt theme that I seem to have been on for the past several weeks, Ginny Owens sings a song that’s first verse and chorus say:

“No, Lord” he said,
“You’ve got the wrong guy.
Simple conversation gets me tongue tied
And you’re telling me to speak with a maniac king.
Or could it be, I’ve lost my mind
Besides I am weak don’t you want someone strong
To lead them out of Egypt when they’ve been there so long.
And anyway they won’t believe you ever spoke to me”
“It’s not your problem.” God replied
And the rest is history.

“There’s a bigger picture you can’t see.
You don’t have to change the world just trust in me.
Cause I am your creator I am working out my plan
And through you I’ll show them I Am.”

How refreshing it is to remember that the ‘giants’ of scripture struggled with many of the same things we struggle with. I mean, Moses had a bush in flames talking to him, and he was still unsure…and yet sure enough to listen. Moses doubted his own abilities. And he told God this. But, Moses trusted God more than he trusted what he thought or felt. And because Moses listened to God he was able to not only watch God perform amazing miracles, but to be used in the midst of those miracles.

I am scared. I can’t see the next step. More than once I’ve told God he’s crazy. More than once I’ve brought up my lack of language skills, my uncertainty in leadership, my fear of people. But every time I come back fact that more than I trust myself, I trust him. He has been so faithful in everything. And with all that he has done to move me to this place (both physically and spiritually) I would be the crazy one if I thought that what I can see behind me could ever be better than what I can’t see in front of me.

And so, I hold my breath a little, reach out my hand to the one that I know is in front of me even when I cannot see it, and begin to put one foot in front of the other.

I trust. In him.

Painting Pictures of Egypt

2008-09-03T18:24:00.001+03:00

I don’t want to leave here
I don’t want to stay
It feels like pinching to me either way
The places I long for the most
Are the places where I’ve been
They are calling after me like a long lost friend

It’s not about losing faith
It’s not about trust
It’s all about comfortable
When you move so much
The place I was wasn’t perfect
But I had found a way to live
It wasn’t milk or honey
But then neither is this

CHORUS:
I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I"ve learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned

The past is so tangible
I know it by heart
Familiar things are never easy to discard
I was dying for some freedom
But now I hesitate to go
Caught between the promise
And the things I know

BRIDGE:
If it comes too quick
I may not recognize it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
If it comes too quick
I may not appreciate it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?

-Sara Groves

I've never actually heard this song, but a friend sent it to me and the words just so totally spoke my heart in the moment I received it.

Maybe you read my post about summer. At the end of it I mentioned that the pastor preached about the Israelites and their desire to return to what they knew rather than keep heading to what they could not yet see. In the past couple weeks I have related to them on many levels. I'm no good at waiting. (Maybe that's part of the reason I'm here...) But, "I fix my eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen" and I wait, trusting him. Because he is perfect.

My Weekend In Kiev

2008-09-01T15:23:00.000+03:00

Many of you know about the craziness with my debit card and trying to get that situation fixed. THANK YOU for your prayers on my behalf. It looks like that adventure is coming to a close. Insurance covered my losses. I need to drop a few more documents off at the police department here in Poltava and figure out how to get my new debit card across the ocean. But, the drama is basically over :o)

In the middle of afore mentioned crisis my mom sent me an e-mail reminding me to praise God. I am blessed to have a mom who “gets it.” I know she was over there in Tallahassee freaking out about the whole situation and wishing she could help me (even though she was helping me more than she will ever know). But somewhere in the middle of her struggle, when maybe she wasn’t sure herself about how to respond, she knew to remind me to praise him.

And though my weekend was still stressful, I was able to look past the craziness of it and say “ok, so I have to go to Kiev this weekend. Let’s make the most of our time there.” And that was good.

How I deal with stressful situations: take a deep breath and plow forward, taking care of everything I can take care of and trying not to think about the things I have no control over until eventually it’s all too much and I can’t take it anymore…then I call a friend and either cry or yell for a duration of time that those who have been subject to said phone calls have taken to calling “two minutes.” The “too much” this time around was when the embassy accidentally stuck my passport in with someone else’s docs and spent 30 mins trying to find it and asking me if I was sure they hadn’t handed it back to me. The recipient of the “two minute” phone call was Oleg Magdych who heroically came and picked me up, helped me finish what I needed to do and took me home to rest and spend time with his family—always a pick me up ;o)

Emily and the Beckets graciously hosted me while I was in Kiev and we, as always, had good conversations about life and what God is doing.

Also saw Michelle, whom I had only seen once since I got back from the states in June. She and I understand each other ministry wise in a lot of ways, so I always enjoy time with her.

Sunday Bob and JoAnn were back so I got to see them. And then headed to meet Pasha, and, in effect, some of the New Life kids. It was a crazy afternoon which ended in my epic failing at CounterStrike. But it was totally worth it.

Monday, I returned to Poltava. And that is another post for another day…with pictures to come :o)

Summer Update (in short)

2008-08-30T19:20:00.000+03:00

I would say my life has been insane the past couple weeks, but then I back up and realize the whole summer has been full of unexpectedness and talking to my friend Daniel today was reminded that my life here started with just as much craziness. (Another one of those paradoxes I love so much—crazy, at this point, would be a calm and quiet day.)

What God has been ingraining in me this summer: He is perfect. Always. In everything.

On the plane heading back from the states in June, I tried to picture what my summer would look like. I couldn’t do it. I saw Poltava on the horizon, but couldn’t judge how far away it was, how long it would take me to get there or what all would occur between the time I stepped off the plane and the moment I walked across the threshold into my apartment there.

So many days I longed for it. A couple times I even held my breath. He said wait. And so I did.

My waiting me landed me back at camps this summer. Unexpected. But perfect. Being at camp gave me many opportunities to tell my story, strengthened relationships that I know I am going to need and forced me to use my Russian. I made new friends—even a couple who live in Poltava (perfect). God let me be part of a ‘moment’ in a friend’s life that I had been praying for the entire time I have been in Ukraine. (perfect.)

Being at camp in Bucha also opened the door to helping out with an orphan camp going on in Poltava. And Magdych loaded the van with my stuff and Radooga’s stuff…and so it began...

Upon arrival in Poltava, I stood outside the door to our apartment praying that it would be God’s and that those who enter it would feel the same spirit that Amberly, mom and I had all felt upon entering the Zychinko’s apartment. I stepped in, looked around, grabbed my ‘camp’ suitcase and headed to the van letting out the breath I had been holding.

Camp in Poltava was really hard. Very different from what we’re used to. And for me personally, not having Americans there really through me for a loop. Pasha suggested I teach English classes, lead English worship, “and anything else Americans do. Lori will do everything.” ;o) This obviously not being the case, I would like to say that I was SO impressed with our team who took our ‘flexibility’ motto of the summer to a WHOLE new level. Everyone led ‘craft class’ in place of English classes and by popular request we instated the first ever “Radooga Discoteka.”

The day the Ukrainian staff left camp was a really hard day for me. I thanked him for my ‘transition’ week with friends and asked if He was sure about my staying here, knowing full well the answer to the question. And for the first time without preceding or following with the statement “I’m excited” I said, “I’m scared.”

The next couple days were spent with the Magdych’s and Alyona (actress and friend) in our apartment, seeing the city and meeting with friends.

Then I got to go with the Magdych’s on vacation to their parents ‘dacha’ where we rested for a couple days before returning to Poltava.

On Sunday morning as I hugged them goodbye at 5 in the morning again I said “God, are you sure?”

Later that morning, my new friend Alyona, met me at the bus stop to help me get to her church. The preacher preached in Ukrainian and Alyona translated into Russian for me—kinda cool :o) Anyway, he talked about how as soon as we see a problem, as soon as something goes wrong, we want to turn around and go back. We decide that God must not be in it. He referenced the Israelites and how they got out of Egypt, but as soon as things got difficult they wanted to turn around and go back—even into slavery. Even as he preached it I thought “yeah, when the Radooga team was leaving camp I thought ‘God, are you sure Poltava? Did I really hear you?” and again as Magdychi left on just that morning I had asked Him ‘here?’ both times without response, but both times clinging to the memory of sitting in Jenn’s kitchen at orphanage 12 and all the events after that the I know He gave me to remind me that yes, He did say and yes, he has (and is) providing. Even to the point that the preacher read Isaiah 55, the chapter I am memorizing.

God is perfect.

Back Bloging

2008-08-17T19:41:00.004+03:00

Looks like I may have made it back into the land of the internet.

The following posts were written while I was not in this world.

So much more to say. As I begin to process life, I will start to write again and catch you up on the 20 missing days between posts :o)

June 23, 2008

2008-08-17T19:40:00.000+03:00

Today, I decided to go for a walk. I threw on an old t-shirt; pulled on the capris that had been lying on top of the dirty clothes pile and slipped my feet into the flip flops nearest the door as I slid my keys into the lock to unlatch the door. I relocked it behind me and waited for the elevator to climb nine floors and let me in. As usual, when the elevator reached the ground floor, I almost subconsciously extended my hand using my super hero powers to open the doors. Leaving the building I thrust my hand into my pocket grabbed my hair tie and pulled my hair back out of my eyes and breathed deeply soaking in the sun and fresh air.

The weather has been absolutely gorgeous since I have been home and I love to watch the people that it brings out—moms pushing baby strollers, kids playing soccer on the basketball courts, couples on swing sets, older men with their chess boards sitting on benches. Everywhere are signs of life and I love it.

Its 10:00 and people are just now beginning to turn on lights inside their apartments as the moon creeps higher in the sky which is this amazing, deep, midnight blue color. The sun will be back long before I awaken. I think I am going to make a cup of tea, put in “You’ve Got Mail,” curl up next to my open window and call it a day.

July 8th, 2008

2008-08-17T19:39:00.000+03:00

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16, NIV

The other day I gave my left over French fries to a kid sitting on the stoop outside of McDonalds. He was there with a girl, smoking, and I’d seen him begging earlier. On my way to the bus, I walked right passed them, then turned around and went back. I asked if they wanted my fries. The girl pointed to him and as our hands briefly touched around the fry box a huge smile spread over his cigarette-smudged face and he said “Spaciba.” I smiled back and simply said “Pozhalusta” and as I walked on to my bus thoughts—wishes— of having said more ran through my head. “You could have told him Jesus loves him”, I told myself. And then thought of how odd, how trite, how irrelevant that statement is to someone who doesn’t know. That thought, the thought of saying Jesus loves you being the absolute wrong thing to say if it was all I had to say left me uneasy inside. It has been haunting me all week and, honestly, I’ve tried to avoid thinking about it.

Later in the week a friend of mine was talking about how she had been struggling with the fact that she was unworthy of Jesus’ death. She just couldn’t understand why he would die for her and why he would continually offer her forgiveness. I mentioned his ways and thoughts being higher than ours.

But tonight, as I sat by my window praying for Poltava and talking to God, John 3:16 ran through my head. And everything made so much since again. That is the message that I have to tell. That is the answer to my friend’s question of “why for me?”

It’s not about Jesus loving me or you or even the whole world. And at the same time, that’s the entirety of it (I’m a huge fan of paradoxes). The answer to why starts with the beginning of that verse. In the English language the word for can be translated because:

Because God.
So loved.
The world.
He gave.

I pray the kid who ate my fries will come to know Love, not just hear that he is [loved]. That someone will come and tell him that salvation waits for him in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ and in that there is hope.

To my friend, I would like to add to my statement that His thoughts are higher than ours. I would like to tell her that yes, he died for her sin, but he died for his glory.

Revelation 7:10 “…salvation belongs to our God…”

Ezekiel 36:22-23
Therefore say to house of Israel, “this is what the Sovereign Lord says: it is not for your sake, O house of Israel, that I am going to do these things, but for the sake of my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations where you have gone. I will show the holiness of my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, the name you have profaned among them. Then the nations will know that I am the Lord, declares the Sovereign Lord, when I show myself holy through you before their eyes.

July 28th 2008

2008-08-17T19:38:00.000+03:00

This summer already looks nothing like I expected it to. Over and over I keep coming back to the verse in Isaiah 55 that says his ways and thoughts are higher than ours. I am so thankful for all the things I never would have dreamed of scheduling in to my summer. That is not to say that this summer has been easy—in fact, I would venture to say it has been the hardest yet. But, it has been blessed and I have experienced the joy of SEEING that blessing.

Many of you know that my bags were packed for Poltava before I even left for America in May. I knew God had said go and I wanted to be ready. I got back to Kiev and got to eat lunch with Radooga staff before they began their camp season. I spent some time with friends in Kiev. I met up with Kevin and John’s teams both before and after their camps, respectively in Lugansk and Harkov. I spent A LOT of time on my knees about Poltava, street kids, orphans, direction and opportunity.

I went out to Bucha (small town right outside of Kiev where Radooga camps were held last summer) to do an English Class training session for Radooga. A good friend was driving me back to the city when a phone call came saying they were understaffed for the next two camps. I was asked to come serve as somewhat of a nanny for some of the staff members and to help set the cafeteria before each meal. I asked for a couple hours to think about it. A couple hours later I agreed to go, got home, packed my bags and went to bed wondering if I had made the right decision and praying God would help me to be a blessing and to serve with a humble spirit and a good attitude, remembering that all I do I do for him. He was more than faithful and I had so much fun setting the cafeteria, hanging out with American teams, playing with campers, worshiping with friends.

Through working camps the past couple weeks, a new Poltava opportunity has presented itself. (Isn’t God just incredible with the details! I wish I could tell you everything he’s done over the past couple weeks). The pastor that I hope to work with there was the camp pastor for camp 3. While he was at camp Randy Hall had gone to the orphan camp in Poltava to visit his kids. He got back and told us that the kids don’t have any program there or anything going on. Igor, the pastor, went home, visited the camp and decided that he wanted to do something. He called us and several of my friends and I are meeting with Igor on Tuesday to talk about what we can do there and hopefully Wednesday night we will head to Poltava. We will take all my stuff to my apartment in Poltava and then head to camp this weekend.

Please pray that we will be a blessing to the kids and to the camp workers and director. Pray for us to share Christ both in actions and words. Pray for me as this will be my first non-English language camp :o) Pray for God to give Igor and I direction for the future, for my meeting the orphanage director and the kids.

From School Bus to Marshrootka

2008-06-20T18:39:00.000+03:00

Riding the Marshrootka home tonight, I went back to my 9th grade year when I used to ride the bus. I hated 9th grade. I went to a school where I didn’t know anyone; I moved up to the high school youth group even though my friends from church at the time all happened to be younger than me and would continue in the middle school ministry for another year or two. As for most high school kids, having my social connections all messed up seemed like the end of the world. For the first several weeks I rode the bus home in tears. And still crying, would call my mom and tell her how horrible things were. Out of self pity, I started talking to Jesus on those bus rides home. Telling Him how terrible it was and asking for a friend. And, in the human form, he sent several over the next couple years. But the real gift He gave me that year was a renewed relationship with Him. An understanding that He wasn’t just sitting up in Heaven on a throne watching my pain and thinking “gosh, Lori, when will you ever get life figured out.” No, a couple thousand years before He had left that behind in order to show all of us just how big His love is. And He didn’t just die for us; He rose and conquered death. And He didn’t just ascend into Heaven; He sent us His Holy Spirit to be with us constantly. And when He did that He knew that in 1997 in Tallahassee, FL there would be an insecure 14 year old girl who would need the friendship that only He has to offer. I don’t always feel as close to Him as I did during that year. Last semester I spent a lot of time asking Him for that closeness again. Today I feel it. Tomorrow I pray I will, but I may not. And regardless of how I feel, I take comfort in knowing that God is love. And He is the same yesterday, today and forever.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMES (and MRS. BETTIE!)

2008-06-17T23:54:00.002+03:00

(Disclaimer: This is not a Birthday post, but I thought I'd give a shout out to you awesome people in the title there. I love you both and will be sure to pray for you today!)

Sleep patterns still aren’t where I’d like them to be. I tend to be tired in the middle of the day and ready to stay up all night. Kind of like when I was in college…

Today was beautiful. So is tonight. Not too hot, not too cold. I laid around for way too long this morning; Emily came over just in time for lunch and to get a hot shower (her hot water has been off for two weeks already…wonder when our turn will come). We chatted and then she was headed to a meeting. I needed to be preparing for teaching Americans how to teach English tomorrow, but the beautiful day (and my lack of motivation at the time) led to a walk around my little section of the city. It was very refreshing and I came home with much more enthusiasm for preparing my notes, listened to Rich Mullins and made a cup of coffee. Mmmmm.

I get to see team Brookhills tomorrow. I’m pretty excited about that. Kevin. Gretchka. Yeeessss. If you want to, Join me in praying for them this next week. They will be serving at a camp in Lughansk (I have no idea how to write that in Latin letters…so, forgive the spelling.), a city near the Russian boarder. I’ll try to get more details about that and specific prayer requests tomorrow when I see them.

June 11, 2008

2008-06-14T16:01:00.000+03:00

Saying goodbye to my friends and family in Tallahassee is never easy. Though, saying bye to Calyn two days earlier did make the final hugs at the airport a little more bearable. And I must admit that as I boarded the plane this time excitement about the future overshadowed the sadness of saying goodbye yet again.

Toddie let me speak at youth the day before I left and I encouraged the teenagers at Northwoods to just spend time with Him everyday and not worry about the BIG future that now seems so vast…Something I am learning to do myself. Putting myself in their shoes (and remembering what it was like to be in high school), I thought about all the people pressing them to make decisions about where to go to school and what to major in…The questions that adults ask you include: so, what do you want to do? And are you dating anyone? I hated this. And always felt like I was struggling to come up with a good answer…And now, I find myself sometimes asking the very same questions (sorry if you were one of the people subject to such questions from me). Of Christian youth, here is the question we need to be asking, “Have you talked to God today?” If the answer is no, encourage them to do so and if the answer is yes follow up with a “and what are you and God doing today?” Radical? Maybe. Scary? Sure. There are certainly days I have needed to hear this question (though those are also the days I probably didn’t want to hear it.) But, I know that the God of the Universe speaks to ALL His children. And I think that with Him we, as Christians, could be doing so much more than we are currently. And it’s probably not some huge thing that He is calling us to. But if we would diligently seek Him everyday, I think we might be more excited about who He is. And if we were more excited about who He is, I think we would be more willing to share that with others. I think that if we are with Him constantly that we couldn’t help talk about Him…I think it would just come out. I want to be that close to Him. I want Him to be that big a part of me. The Bible says that He must become greater and I must become less. Still something I struggle with, but something I’m working on.

Anyway, I made it safely to Kiev. Rested all day yesterday and am ready for today. I’m excited about what God is doing here and glad to be a part of it…at least until He moves me to Poltava. And I’m not exactly sure when that will be, but I will keep you posted. I’ve decided to wait on Him. And for now, that means one day at a time. I have vision for the future, and as much as I would have loved to have been in Poltava yesterday I know that His timing is perfect so today, I wait.

April's Update

2008-04-24T12:07:00.005+03:00

*edited for blogger.

God is doing a new thing. And He is totally overwhelming me with His perfection in everything.

Jenn Smith and her four children arrived home last Saturday. And if you’re interested in following their post-Ukraine story they are blogging at This Is Family. I am so thrilled for them to finally be home and all together. God taught me so much about Himself while they were on this side of the ocean and I am so thankful for Mark and Jenn and their commitment to follow Him and help others to do the same. THANK YOU GUYS! I can’t wait to visit them while I am stateside in May.

I am preparing to head stateside for a month in about two weeks and finishing up Russian classes and English curriculum here before I leave.

As many of you know, I have been asking God for direction since last August as to of what is next in my life. Never doubting my call to Ukraine, but constantly questioning what God was doing and when He would reveal Himself to me, I waited. (Nick, your posts about waiting; I was like, man, I totally understand him and am so proud of him because I know how hard…and at the same time how wonderful…that can be. Nick—you rock! Check out Nick’s blog.)

And Wednesday a week ago God lifted the fog and sitting in Jenn’s kitchen at Orphanage 12 and clearer than anything I’ve heard in a long time I knew I was supposed to move to Poltava—a city about 215 miles east of Kiev. Some of you may remember Calyn and I talking about “the best road trip ever.” It was to Poltava. And on that trip moving there was mentioned. I have mentioned it since, very serious about it, but serious about it way in the future, not ever thinking “now” or even “soon” was the time. And so, looking back, I feel like I should have seen it coming all along. But, God’s timing is perfect and He caught me totally off guard. And when He did, I knew. I wish I could recount to you the conversation Jenn and I had in her kitchen that evening but I don’t remember much of it. I remember her voicing what I had already heard God say which was “you go [to Poltava].” And I cried for the first time in a long time—tears of “oh my gosh, God, I wasn’t looking for You or expecting You, but here You are in a tiny kitchen in Ukraine answering questions I had given up on asking and totally changing my life. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You.” Jenn asked me what I was most scared of. And my honest answer in that moment was “the fact that I am not scared at all.” Granted, that moment has passed and now I am terrified outside my mind and keep telling God He is crazy. But in that moment all I had was assurance.

Walking home that night, I was overwhelmed and told God that I couldn’t do it. I didn’t even know what it was. And the answer was its true, I can’t. But He can. And He will.

The past week has been an incredible number of perfect timing moments. Some of which I hope to share soon. For now, I need to get ready for Russian Class.

Your prayers, encouragement, support, e-mails, letters (thanks Grandma!!!), and comments are so precious to me. Thank you.

“If You say "go" we will go

If You say "wait" we will wait

If You say "Step out on the water"

and they say, "it can't be done"

We'll fix our eyes on You

and we will come

Your ways are higher than our ways

And the plans that You have made are good and true

If You call us to the fire

You will not withdraw Your hand

We'll gaze into the flames and look for You”

Faithful to Me

2008-04-16T20:08:00.003+03:00

All the chistles I've dulled carving idols of stone
That have crumbled like sand 'neath the waves.
I've recklessly built all my dreams in the sand just to watch, them all wash away.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

All the pennies I've wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly for a faith
To be faithful to me.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

Jennifer Knapp

Faithful to Me

2008-04-16T20:08:00.001+03:00

Jennifer Knapp

Blessed.

2008-04-15T12:10:00.003+03:00

I've said it before, and it's been on my mind a lot these past couple days...but sometimes we, as Christians, feel like we deserve something. Like because we are "good" or even just because we chose to accept Chirst as Savior He owes us more...and we sugar coat "more" with the title "blessing." We say things like "trust God and everything will work out." Don't misunderstand me. I try to trust God in everything. And I do believe that He IS in control. And that everything WILL work out for His ultimate glory. But also understand that He tells us that His ways are NOT our ways. They are much MUCH higher than ours. And often times they look nothing like we would expect. Remember that materialism is of this world and NOT of our Father. He wants what is best for you, but remember that what is best is HIM.

I thank God before I eat each meal, but I try to remember that I do not need it or even deserve it. There are many, many starving people in the world. And many of them are Christians. They are NOT unblessed.

I talk to Him as I curl up under covers and with my body pillow each night, but last night, I was reminded that I could be asked to let go of my cumfy bed and live elsewhere. And most of us would consider that sacrifice. We know little of this word. I'm tired of thinking that following Him is sacrifice. He did the sacrificing. Following Him is joy--whereever that leads.

I do not believe that the Christians in Uganada are any less blessed than I am. Often times I think those with less understand the heart of the Father better--and THAT is the greater blessing. I know it is.

I can't wrap my mind around the hurting in this world. I can't understand how or why God wouldn't step in and stop the abuse of children that I see; yet alone the horrors that I don't see and can't imagine. But I know what I feel...and I know His knowlege and His hurting is far greater and deeper than mine.

I know that He is working and moving and changing lives.

He is providing families for those who don't have them.

Sending people to build shelter for those without.

Digging wells in places that need water.

Producing fruit crops in abundance for those who need food.

God, may I never forget that YOU are all I need. Help me to get to a point where YOU are all I want.

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
'Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case ...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case ...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view
If no roof is overhead
And if we never taste that bread

Oh, the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need

So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case ...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessd beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace ...

But, Jesus, would You please ...

Nichole Nordeman, Gratitude

Following and Trusting

2008-04-10T12:45:00.001+03:00

Max Lucado wrote, “‘He leads me.’ God isn’t behind me yelling ‘Go!’ He is ahead of me bidding ‘Come!’ He is in the front, clearing the path, cutting the brush, showing the way…He promises a lamp unto our feet, not a crystal ball into the future. We do not need to know what will happen tomorrow. We only need to know he leads us and ‘we will find grace to help us in our time of need.’ (Heb. 4:16).”

I can’t tell you how timely reading these words was for me. (Though I’m sure He could.) I’m learning (still learning, mind you,) to take it one step at a time. I can’t see tomorrow today and I’m beginning to be okay with that. Beginning to trust more in Him with the knowledge that He can and He already has it all taken care of.

Вопрос с Pебром: Radooga Conference 2008

2008-04-03T09:40:00.004+03:00

Probably the most encouraging thing to me about Radooga’s conference this year was to witness Ukrainians in ministry. (Slightly ironic due to the presence of an Iranian-American speaker, who did an AWESOME job meeting Ukrainian youth where they are and encouraging them to raise the bar for their generation).

One friend who had taken a group of youth from Ukraine to India this past year shared about his trip.

Another lady working at a woman’s pregnancy center shared about her ministry.

Miss Ukraine 2007 shared and is traveling the country speaking to teenage girls about her relationship with Christ.

Several young adults who used to attend our camps as campers are now bringing youth or working with us on our drama team or doing registration.

Conference was advertised as a conference about relationships—and it was. But, it was also a spring board to talk about holy living. And holiness is one of those things, I just can’t quite get a grip on. One of those things I probably never really will. All I really understand is that God is—holy, perfect, flawless, without fault, never said the wrong thing or even thought a wrong thought, always loving, his judgments are always correct and because I am not, I can’t wrap my head around that fact. Bring in the fact that He sent His holy Son, an extension of Himself, to be killed in my place so that unholy, imperfect, flawfull, many faults, say the wrong thing all the time, think the wrong thing even more frequently, not always loving, often incorrect in my judgments me might have relationship with Him. I accept it. And I praise Him for it. I just don’t get it. But I am so grateful for those who are taking about it, and I pray that those who hear it will accept it despite the insanity of it because relationship with Him is everything. And I want to live this year with that being more and more evident in my life. I want to strive for deeper holiness. I want to share the story more of the One who “so loved the world” because I can’t imagine where I would be today without Him. Certainly not in Kiev watching Ukrainians change their world. And there is no place on earth I would rather be today (though there are several of you across the ocean I would love to have here with me today :o)

2008-04-02T12:05:00.000+03:00

God,
I know you see the tears and hear the cries of your children. I can’t imagine the pain it brings You. Because I see such a small percentage of that in the orphans here in Kiev. Thank You that You are Daddy. Thank You that You love and You care and You do. Please continue to lead and to guide me. To give me wisdom and direction. That I might be Your hands and Your voice to the people You continue to place in my life. Thank You for the Smith family who have been a constant reminder to me that You are in control and You are Hope and Love and Life and Peace and Home. Thank You.

Some things never change...

2008-03-01T12:48:00.000+02:00

For one, a morning person I am not. Sure, I can get up early, I just don’t enjoy it. And I am not one to talk when I first wake up. Oksana and I have taken to waving at each other each morning as opposed to speaking. We understand each other well ;o)

Two, I still crave icecream after a stressful day. And if I can have it with coffee, that’s even better.

Three, I will always do better on an essay test than on multiple choice, fill in the blank or whatever other type you want to throw at me. It was true in high school and it is true now. I often say that living in Ukraine, everyday is a cumulative test of my language skills. No more of those “this test will be over chapter seven. No, you can plan to go to the market and pull out your chapter three vocabulary; or on Sundays you can be prepared for chapter eighteen, Religious Words and Phrases, but you never know when your roommate is going to start talking about the Soviet military (I must have skipped over that chapter) or when a lady at a youth pastor’s meeting is going to question you about Radooga’s upcoming conference “The Problem With The Rib” (referencing Eve being made from Adam’s rib and sounding slightly better in Russian than it does in English). You just can’t prepare for these things. Hence the everyday being one big test of my language skills (which, believe me, are still quite lacking).

Anyway, yesterday in class we had a more customary type of test. And I did fine on the test as a whole, but my teacher finished reading the essay part, looked up and said “I haven’t met many people who do better on my essays than on the other parts of my test, but your essay is basically flawless save a few spelling errors.” (Yet another thing that will never change, I can’t spell in English, forget Russian) Why is this? Because I don’t try and say what I don’t know I can say. I had a history class in high school and the teacher gave us the option of taking a scantron test or an essay test. Out of 30 students I was the only one who opted to take the essay test and I always opted to take the essay test. An essay test tests what you do know and a scantron test tests what you don’t know. I don’t know a lot. But, I can talk about what I do know when prompted. ;o)

The St. Petersburg boys have left; and so has my toothbrush?

2008-02-23T21:06:00.002+02:00

Dennis walked into the kitchen the other day and said “we’re like the Radisson.” I can only assume he means because we have had non-stop people staying with us since I got home at the end of December— it’s like camp year round. “I think we’re better,” I told him, referring to the fact that Momma Olya and Oksana provide unbelievable cooking and cleaning services, not to mention ‘tea time’ and friendship. I love that my Ukrainian family is so hospitable and that their heart is to serve and bless others; it’s a huge blessing to me ;o)

The most recent of our guests to come and go were three teenage boys from St. Petersburg (Russia, not Florida). They’re dad is a pastor and he brought a team to meet with some of the leaders of Hillsong Kiev; and his boys, having not been to Ukraine before came too. They stayed with us and it was fun to spend time with them and listen to them laugh at the differences in the Ukrainian and Russian languages. I’m so used to being surrounded by people who speak both. I forget that just because a person speaks Russian doesn’t necessarily mean they speak Ukrainian. We even got to celebrate one of the boys, Timothy’s, birthday. Fun times!

The morning after they left, had breakfast and then went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and my toothbrush was missing. Hmmmm….I thought to myself. Did someone accidentally grab my toothbrush in their rush to throw their stuff together that morning or had they been using it all along? Are they aware that they are using someone else’s toothbrush? We may never know. (and may not want to…)

I have been using my travel toothbrush, having not yet been to the magazine to purchase a new one.

However, upon recounting this story to the Magdych family last night Oksana jumps up and Magdych announces that her brother is working for a company that makes toothbrushes. Oksana comes back with a green one and Magdych says “do you like green? We have other colors.” Green is good. Yay! For my new toothbrush!

Thanks Magdychi, you are my heroes yet again!

Awesome Present :o)

2008-02-13T15:10:00.002+02:00

I got this super great package in the mail the other day from one of our summer staff girls.

Pretty much the best ever.

Spaciba, Allison :o)

He sees. He hears. He loves. He saves.

2008-02-10T17:03:00.000+02:00

Hearing stories of Street Kids (both first hand and through friends who have been involved in such ministries) and spending time with Mark and Jenn at the orphanage and hearing some of these kids stories has been a real struggle of faith for me for the past year or so. Earlier this winter I blogged about being outside in the freezing weather waiting for a marshrootka and having my heart break thinking—and trying not to think—about the children who have no home to go to.

I cannot express the joy to you that I have felt as I have had the privilege of meeting recently adopted Chris Underwood and getting to know Kevin and John (Mark and Jenn’s Kiev boys). I am watching God build families and it is so utterly amazing that I cannot do it justice with words. Hopelessness traded for hope. God doing God things leaves me stunned. But as my eyes float around the orphanage to the other children, I can’t help but question my Father, “Daddy, what about them?”

The closer the proximity to a problem, the more the heart is affected by it, I know. And yet, something (or perhaps Someone) inside me drives me to involve myself more and more though something else argues that I could never do enough, never love them all. And somehow, kind of like in that starfish story, I know that I can love this one. And this one. And this one. And maybe it will matter to these. And I can trust the Father to send others to adopt, others to pray, others to love.

This week I reread a book called Vienna Prelude. It is a fiction novel about a young girl during WWII who helped get Jewish children to safety. There is a point in the novel where she too wonders about the mercy of God as she sees innocent people—His people—suffer. And often remember the phrase from a song “what God has done is rightly done” she thinks to herself “God has seen the desperate children and the evil darkness that would cover the earth. And He had provided some hope, a few small shimmering candles that illuminated a narrow path to safety. In that instant she felt like weeping with relief. None of this was up to her. She had only to make herself available and God would do what must be rightly done.”

Thank you, Mark and Jenn. Emily. Michelle. Child Rescue. Dennis. The Hall’s. Reach Orphans With Hope. Max. And all the other lights that God is using to pierce the darkness on the streets and in the orphanages in Ukraine.

Thank you, Alan, for your sermon this morning on the infinity of the God we serve. When I (sort of—because that’s as far as I ever get) begin to grasp how big He is, it becomes easier for me to let go, trust Him and step in faith. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. God, what do You want me to do?

hope. faith. love.

2008-01-29T13:01:00.000+02:00

We just got off the phone with the eldest of the, soon to be official, Smith children and I cannot imagine what a joy it was for them to hear their son’s voice on the phone because I, myself, was delighted to hear him say “tell my mom and dad that I love them and that my brother and I are waiting for them.”

Already I can see— in his mannerisms, his actions and his words— that he was born (he was created) to be the person that he is becoming. I am honored to know him and to be able to watch him step into his destiny. THANK YOU, Mark and Jenn for being such amazing hands of God in him taking that step.

In my head I am watching a mother and father take their toddler by the hands, one on each side, as he skips along, at times lifting both feet off the ground and swinging between his two parents. That toddler is not afraid to jump. He knows that his parents will hold his hands and not let him fall. John is much bigger than that toddler; and his jump—his risk— is greater too. But, in his eyes and in his voice I see and I hear that he trusts you with his future.

I want to trust God like that. John does not know what tomorrow holds. And he has been waiting a long time; and he still isn’t certain of how much longer he will have to wait. But he called today and said “we will wait for you.” And he knows that you will come.

I too don’t know what tomorrow holds. But when I begin to worry or to doubt what God has planned for me I will close my eyes and think of the moment John first walked into the room that first day and remember to hope. And I will think of his voice on the phone this afternoon and remember to be sure of what I hope for and certain of what I do not yet see: to have faith!!!

Perfect Timing

2008-01-27T16:54:00.000+02:00

Timing is everything. Or so they say. I’m not really sure what I think or how I feel about this statement yet. But, one thing I’m certain of is that time is nothing to God. He knows all, sees all, orchestrates history and never, for one second is time out of His control.

Mark and Jenn are here and it has been really cool talking to them about God’s perfect timing in their whole adoption process up to this point, and all of us being able to look ahead with the assurance that He hasn’t missed one step and thus the faith and knowledge that He’s not going to.

When Lauren was here I was talking about wanting to make a photo book of God’s faithfulness in my life thus far and maybe being able to add to it in the future. Lauren said something about being an author, the best story she has to tell is that of her relationship with Christ. True story. When I think back over where I have been and look forward to where I might be headed I am baffled at the perfection of God’s timing—and I want to be able to share that with others.

Thinking about all that, I want to learn to worry less and trust God more. I mean, I know that my eternity is secure. So, I think I’ll stop worrying about the control I will never have over circumstances and other people and rejoice in the fact that I get to live each day with the One who created time and who is made happy when I rejoice in seeing His hand in my past, present and future.

January 13, 2008

2008-01-22T12:19:00.000+02:00

First, Happy Old New Year. (Whatever that means. Something about the old calendar and when New Years used to be celebrated.) This basically marks the end of the holiday season in Kiev. Christmas garland is being sold for cheap so as not to have to store it until next year, the fireworks have dwindled back to once every other evening or so and the fridge isn’t quite as full as it had been for the past couple of months.

It was good to be at KIBC this morning. I missed worshiping with people there. I missed praying with Isaac during prayer time and watching Emily feel out her place as worship leader (she’s grown a lot in the month I have been gone and it was really a blessing to see her spread her wings a bit more this morning than I think she’s felt free to in the past. :o). I missed hugs and prayer updates from Katy. And I was glad to be able to do the power point again. I was also excited to see one of our Iranian members come to English Bible Study since we weren’t having Farsi Bible Study and really excited to see several people jump at the opportunity to interpret for him when he walked in. I saw a beautiful picture of His Church in my friends this morning and I am still thanking God for the unexpected blessing that I found in that.

"Letter to Me"

2008-01-12T20:36:00.000+02:00

Dear Lori,

If asked by a man with Brad Paisley album qualities, say yes.

--Future Lori

I should be doing my Russian homework...I don't know when I will have time to do it tomorrow...but the Internet is more enticing at the moment.

My attempts to write a blog about why I would marry a Brad Paisley album (and I would) have thus far been unsuccessful. But, let me just say that if a man as sweet, fun-loving, clever, talented, down to earth, romantic and funny as Mud on Tires or 5th Gear asked me to marry him, I would have a hard time turning him down.

Being a girl who grew up in the south, it's just all so relatable.

I mean, who doesn't think that "finding $20 in the britches that you wore last week" is one of the greatest things ever?

And what girl doesn't think that there's something intensely romantic about dancing in a restaurant after hours?

The few times I've sat next to my dad in church, I know he's been thinking that if this "Long Sermon" would end, he could be communing with god the best way he knows how.

Brad's mad guitar skills are pretty sweet too. And add that to every boys fantasy of actually being in a car chase and you've got a great song about outrunning "Mr. Policeman" ;o)

I could use a guy making "Easy Money" to help fund my mission endeavors. :o)

I love the hymns that find their way into the mix of each album. You don't get a Brad Paisley album without one.

He totally fights for the girl he wants; manages to get rid of all other suitors. I mean, they "Never Would Have Worked Out Anyway."

And every girl I know wants a guy who thinks "She's Everything."

I mean, he is "Still a Guy,"

But he knows that it's the "Little Moments" that count.

And who doesn't want some Spaghetti Western Theater every day????

So, yes, hands down, send me a man who enjoys life, loves me, and can strum a guitar. :o)

Home

2007-11-14T16:06:00.000+02:00

I miss Roma already. My brother, my friend.

Roma left on Saturday to go home to his long awaiting betrothed. (also a precious friend of mine) And yes, I believe Roma has gone home.
Just as Arielle came home this summer when she ventured to this side of the ocean.

Home is not a place so much as it is a presence.
Home is with those who love us and with those whom we love.

"Jesus replied, 'If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.'" --John 14:23

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." --John 14:1-3
*italics mine in both verses.

My prayer, Roma and Rel, for you:

"The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace."

If only I could learn languages as quickly as Dora...

2007-11-08T13:02:00.000+02:00

This morning as I was getting ready for the day, I switched on the TV and started flipping through the channels. I paused as I saw Dora and thought, "now this should be entertaining, Dora teaching Spanish in Russian" only I quickly learned that Dora doesn't teach Spanish here--she teaches English. So I watched Dora and Boots learn the words red and green and stop and go as I finished tying my shoes and laughed to myself as I walked out the door.

Pray for Believers Around the World

2007-11-07T16:22:00.000+02:00

I just wanted to let everyone know that Sunday is the International Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church.

Check out the Voice of the Martyrs website to find out ways to both pray and help our brothers and sisters who are being persecuted.

If you live in the South, and don’t have anything planned for Friday night, consider attending Secret Church in Birmingham.

2007-11-06T11:56:00.000+02:00

Paul said “I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty.” I can’t say that I can relate. I don’t know what it is like to be in need and I have always had a warm place to sleep at night. Last night as I sat in the cold waiting for a marshrootka to pick me up and take me to the place where I currently lay my head, my mind began to wander to those who aren’t waiting for a warm bus to take them to a warm apartment. I then thought of my friends who used to live on the street. Of Vlad; and of Max; of the young girl at Agape Church who gave her testimony, of the young boy who gave his at the tennis tournament last week, and I thank Jesus that someone at some time saw them—really saw them—and then cared enough to do something.

Emily had a worship team meeting at her house today and I couldn’t help but think, and I’m pretty sure Emily would agree, that what happens on Sunday morning as the team sings is such a small part of worship. Sunday morning songs are great, but they should be a celebration of the worship that is taking place in our lives every day all week long.

So yes, may I lift my voice in song to Him. May I meet with other believers and enjoy the incredible glimpse of Heaven that I am given each week as we worship together. I thank God for those moments of refreshment and joy. But may I also be one who sees the child on the street, the babushka by the metro, the friend who is hurting, the businessman who lost his dreams somewhere along the way, the girl who is longing for love and finding a cheap imitation, the teenager thinks breaking up is the end of the world. May my heart (followed by my time and my efforts) be focused on the ones who need a savior. (that’s all of us by the way :o) May I see them and then may I love them with the love of the One who first loved me, because He is everything. And anything I have to offer I have because of Him.

“Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” Hebrews 13:15-16

2007-11-02T12:34:00.000+02:00

Today is one of those days I just want to get back in bed and wait for tomorrow to come. (yes, I have them too :o)

Luckily, it's Friday.

Last night, while doing my homework, I watched The Flight of the Navigator. This movie makes me smile because I can remember watching it at my grandmother's house with my cousin Jeremy...

...my grandmother used to tell us she was from another planet...it could be true...

Ok, well, I'm off to class and will see you people in blogger land tomorrow.

2007-11-01T11:52:00.001+02:00

Just for Michelle, I will start this month off with a post. I don't know if I will be able to keep up with it EVERY day, but I will try to post more frequently for this "blog posting month" :o)

Yesterday was Halloween (in case you missed that...or you live in Ukraine where that is not such a big deal). But I love Halloween. (somewhat ironic being that I don't like chocolate). I love it because it is fun. I love it because for one day a year you can be someone (or something) you are not...the dramatist in me :o) This year I was Hermione Granger and when I rang the doorbell at the office, saying, "trick or treat," the trick was that I had the treats. Mars Bars, Snickers and M&Ms.

Hope you had a spooky Halloween!

And you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem...

2007-10-10T10:43:00.000+03:00

This was written and never posted, sorry about that...

Tuesday Oct. 2, 2007

There is so much going on with elections and whatnot I’ve been thinking a lot about Kiev. I was talking to someone the other day who was saying that he never thought he would live in a big city and that there came a point in his life when he was in a big city and he thought “yeah, maybe I could live in a place like this” and now he does. Sometimes I look out my window at the apartments or listen to the street noise and think the same about myself “who would have ever thought I would live in a big city?”

Also, recently I have been trying to figure out where and what God is leading me to at this point in my life. A much smaller thought than the city thoughts I mentioned above…more personal…though hopefully it all ends in influence…which could, I imagine spread to a whole city :o) I mean, Jesus told the disciples to go to Jerusalem, etc.

And as I’ve listened to people at church and other friends over and over again I have heard a cry of “I just wish I knew what God wanted.” “I’m ready to follow Him, I just don’t know where He is leading.” “There are so many things I could do, if I only knew what to do.” And believe me, my heart is there too very often. And over and over again I hear Jeremiah 29:11 spoken to me or to others. Many of you are quoting it to yourself right now, “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”

Reading the verse in context, I am curious as to of which ‘yous’ in the chapter would be a plural form of the word and which ones would be singular in the original text. God is speaking to the Jerusalemites exiled to Babylon…and maybe, to us Zion-ites displaced in this world. But the vision for plans and hope and future are perhaps bigger than us individually—directed at a city (maybe to the church) who should be both plural and singular. (many united as one, in both cases). And God goes beyond promising hope and future to promising prosperity. “Seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord, because if it prospers you too will prosper.”

Cherish the city God has placed you in for this moment. As you look to the future, find ways to serve in the present. I don’t know where God will take me tomorrow, but I do know that for this moment I am here.

I think I’ll go ask Momma Olya to pray for Ukraine with me while we wait for Dennis and Oksana to get home.

Mangagement

2007-09-27T13:03:00.000+03:00

Time Management
Financial Management
Language Learning Management
Life Management...I had a class in high school with that title...there are some things you just can't learn in school...

For all you fans of Dr. Pepper

2007-09-20T11:59:00.001+03:00

Drinking my Dr. Pepper from England yesterday (thank you, Gabi!) reminded me of the last time I had a Dr. Pepper and how at the time I wanted to blog my story, but alas, had no internet…now, having internet, I believe it is a good time to share my story.

Before school started and life got crazy, I had been going Rollerblading with Roma, Andrey, Sasha and Anya twice a week. Which, by the way, is amazing. I miss it a lot now that I’m not going :o( Anyway, we had been going on Thursdays and Saturdays. One Thursday night, I had forgotten the day and Roma called at 7 to see if I was coming. Having not even left my house yet, I was like “well, I forgot what day it is and now its late…” Roma encouraged me to come saying if I left now I would still have time to skate…they had just gotten there. I rushed around the house to run out the door, down the elevator, down the sidewalk and then realized I was wearing flipflops and I hadn’t grabbed any socks. Meh. I ran back up the sidewalk, up the elevator, into my apartment, dug through my drawer for a pair of socks and rushed to the metro…by this time it was getting late and I was thinking maybe I wouldn’t skate, maybe I would just hang out for a little while. As I walked by the shop where we stop to get drinks, I thought, I should take the boys and Anya Snickers. I walked in and as I did directly in front of me in the drink cooler were shinny cans of Dr. Pepper. “No way,” I thought. We have been going in and out of this store twice a week for weeks now and never has there been a Dr. Pepper in it. There are only two or three other places in the city I know of where you can find it at all. And there, only sometimes. But here it was, right in front of me. I smiled. Thanked God for little blessings, grabbed some snickers for the gang and walked out of the store happily sipping my Dr. Pepper. And a couple hours later, as we left the park, Roma went in the store and came out with another Dr. Pepper for me. Two Dr. Peppers in one day. That hasn’t happened since May when I was in the states. Good times.

A Blog about the Summer...

2007-09-04T12:13:00.000+03:00

The summer began as Rel and I were joined by 5 other amazing ladies who would become known as RAS (Radooga American Staff). They traveled from Florida, Texas, Louisiana and Alabama to spend their summer orientating American Teams and serving Ukrainian staff. I could spend this whole post telling you how incredible each of these girls are and what a spectacular team they made…but, alas, this is a post about the summer, so I will spare you…but they are sure to show back up as we continue through the summer…

As team one arrived, we were busy planning and preparing for the first camp. One of the things we did, was paint signs to hang on the outside of the buildings. The camp theme this summer was Action 1 and thus the Auditorium became known as Hollywood, the cafeteria and Hard Rock Café.

This is what happens when you try and clean paint brushes without any paint thinner…My hands remained this color for a couple days. :o)

One really cool thing was getting to know the people that I had met during my stateside trainings this spring. This is a picture of Team One from Houston during our city tour.

English Classes are always fun. I got to visit them all and sub for a couple. My favorite day during English Class was during camp 2. I was walking around checking on everyone and I got to this kid Don's class and they were reading their Bible Verse of the day and I could tell that the kids could read the English, but that they had no idea what they were saying, so I started pointing to individual words and asking them to tell me the word in English and then in Russian. Later, after they had all said their verse and gotten their candy, they told me to say it, so I did...and then they were like "now in Russian" so I translated it as best I could into Russian and I "won" a giant pixi stick. Yeeeessss.

Several people came to visit us at camp this year. I had been really sick one day and almost didn’t get up to go to evening program, but I decided to anyway and was glad I did when I walked upstairs and saw Tyoma sitting in the balcony.

Pasha is demonstrating what happens when you spend too much time in the office. I think it’s time to go play with the kids!

One of the things we do to keep from looking like Pasha in the above photograph is dress up like ninjas for our late night program, BOOM

When Lauren had to go home at the end of camp four, she left her ninja suit for Sergey. Sergey is a very good ninja.

On the first night of each camp, Alosha, this really amazing guy who is kind of like a Ukrainian version of the Power Team, came and did a show for the kids. He was way hardcore and super sweet. :o)

This is Igor. He has been a camper at Radooga for several years. And His faith in God is incredible. When he was a baby his mom killed his dad and tried to kill him, he grew up living all over the place, with his grandma (who died when he was six) and then, moving from Russia to Ukraine, in multiple orphanages. Anyway, this summer, at age 17, having completed nine years of school in only 5, Igor graduated. He wasn’t going to be able to attend his graduation because he had chosen to come to camp, but someone worked it out for him to get to Kiev and back. He was so excited when he got back to camp. It is such an encouragement to me to trust God when I see people like Igor trusting him. His dream is to go to college in the states. And he says, “I believe God will help me to do this.”

Max also shared his amazing testimony each week during camp and even, one special night, in English to the RAS ladies. We love our brother.

On one of the Days off between camps, Roma and Rel had everyone over and we had “family dinner.” Tacos, yum!

This is what I looked like right before they woke me up for dinner. What can I say, camp is awesome; it is also, at times, exhausting.

No camp would be complete without THE CAMP DANCE! This year, RAS ladies came up with most of the dance and Sergey helped with the ending…it was great.

Ukrainian Drama this summer was SO GOOD. Pasha and Max were angels and Pasha was the "teacher" and Natasha was Lucifer and Sergey was her "stunt double" and he and Pasha had an AWESOME sword fight. And every week it (the sword fight, but the drama in its entirety too) got better and better. Week 5, I was standing back stage watching from the side while Pasha and Max are watching Jesus be crucified and Max is trying to run to help him and Pasha is explaining why he can't and Pasha gets really passionate and starts crying and I was crying. I'd seen it 4 times already, and I was back stage, so it wasn't like I was even really intently watching, but OH, they were so good.

Each week, as kids accepted Christ for the first time or recommitted their lives to Him, I was reminded of how awesome He really is. The only one who could save, does. And it is such a beautiful thing to watch.

Worship with Sergey is always amazing. I never get over watching people worship. And something about youth praising God, and for me, especially Ukrainian youth. It is incredible.

Other means of entertainment throughout the summer.

1. Dress up like the actors and come out on stage in the middle of their MC-ing a program.
Laura was in character the whole night. “I think I make am an even better Max than Max” –Laura Godfrey

2. Read HP7. Mom bought it for me in the states, Calyn read it in two days and left me notes in it, Laura and Madison read it in 7 days at camp, also leaving me notes.

At the end of every camp, we had a movie festival. Throughout the week the campers worked with their youth pastors to create a video to be shown at the movie festival. We watched all the videos and then Magdych gave out awards with special guests, Pax. He’s pretty much the best festival director ever. :o)

After camp, we take each American team souvenir shopping on St. Andrews Street.

And, no trip to Kiev would be complete without at least one meal at Puzata Khata, known to many Americans as the “Fat House,” a cafeteria style restaurant with traditional Ukrainian cuisine.

After Ukrainian Bible Study one night, RAS girls had communion with Ukrainian staff. It was really special. And really cool to watch the girls build special relationships with each of the Ukrainian personnel.

Special for me was my mom coming for camp 5. I am so glad she got to experience camp and meet so many of my friends.

The night before the RAS ladies went back to the states, we had taco dinner at the Vasilevsky’s house. Goodbyes are so sad. The hardest of all, though it didn’t happen until the next morning at the airport, was probably this one.

Roma and Arielle have said a lot of long goodbyes. May is almost tomorrow, guys.

After everyone left, mom and I spent five amazing days together. We went sight seeing, clothes shopping, coffee drinking, movie watching and ice skating. She helped me rearrange my new room and do laundry. We even got to hang out with the Magdych’s one night. Yeeeessss. My families converge. :o)

I love my mom.

Fireworks

2007-08-25T14:58:00.000+03:00

In Kiev it is not uncommon to see, or at least hear, fireworks any (and sometimes every) night of the week. Last night, though, every direction I could see from my window someone was setting off fireworks in celebration of this nation’s independence. It was really neat to watch. Then, as I settled into bed, out the window, just above the apartments across the street was the beautiful, bright shining moon. I wish I had my camera so I could have taken a picture. I’m sure it wouldn’t have done it justice, though.

Independence Day

2007-08-24T22:58:00.000+03:00

Happy Independence Day, Ukraine.

Today I was watching a Boy Meets World episode where Cory ends up in 1957. There is an announcement made that Russia has launched a “spy” satellite and they are afraid that Cory is a Russian spy. It made me think about how people must have viewed this area of the world back then and maybe even how people who don’t know better still view the former soviet countries. I got to thinking about how so often when something ‘negative’ is going on, it is all over the news and we fail to pay attention to the positive things happening. Today let’s focus on the positive…and if you know any Ukrainians, wish them a happy 16th birthday :o)
“Look to the nations and watch; stand in awe and be amazed for I am doing something in your day that you would not believe even if you were told.” Habakkuk 1:5

O-M-G it is H-O-T

2007-08-23T18:28:00.000+03:00

So, I may not live in Florida anymore, but I think we may have you guys beat temperature wise. These past couple days have been crazy hot. And the heat doesn't usually bother me. Alan was looking at the weather report and says it is supposed to start cooling off after today. I hope he is right.

This unexpected heat wave, however, has not kept me from using my coffee grinder and press. I make a full press in the morning and drink hot coffee, then I pour what is left into another cup, add cream and sugar and stick in the freezer for a frapichino come mid afternoon. yeeeessss.

Speaking of which...

Highlights

2007-08-18T13:30:00.000+03:00

Michelle is all about people keeping up with their bolgs…and I’ve been gone for so long that I have no clue where to pick up from or where to start…but, for Michelle (and anyone else who reads my blog and has been missing me during my absence) I press on.

This summer was the hardest yet, and still, as things so often seem to work out, it reaped some of the best rewards.

Summer highlights: (in no particular order)

Igor’s graduation
the “Stars” song sung under our window
hundreds of new brothers and sisters
Man with Umbrella
Max’s face as he asked for mac and cheese 3 times a day
Being taken care of by the Magdych’s when I was sick
One really great phone conversation with Calyn
Ninja Night
Worship with Sergey
Gretchka. And his mad drumming skills :o)
Team 1’s amazing creativity
Something about complete sentences
A tea party with the Zychinko’s
Baby Pasha confidently coming in (without knocking) just to hang out with us
Kolya (known to some of you as “my name is Nick”
The most amazing festival director ever.
REAL coffee from Daniel (aka ‘sound’) at a time I desperately needed it :o)
Flowers from a girl in Lauren’s English Class
Futbal
Bible Studies with American teams (ya’ll taught me a lot, thanks!!!)
Visiting English Classes…and getting to play every now and then :o)
Communion with Ukrainian and American staff
Morning stretch in my pajamas :o)
“taking the stage” during worship at the last BOOM—with Valera!!!
Pax2
Collations
Grading English tests with Pasha, Laura and Andrey
Sverchok’s surprise appearance on Roma’s birthday.
Gena’s birthday song as preformed by Max while playing the Jim Bay (as opposed to the accordion)
Praying with Madison
Really great AP time concluded as Pax came and entertained Lauren and I
I hesitate to write this, but alas, feel it must be included, “the naked music.”
A cup of tea Roma brought me while I was doing English testing one day.
City days with Andrey
Spending time with Rel and knowing that soon I will get to do life with her all the time
The most amazing day off ever: Ice Skating, Harry Potter 5 and a double birthday dinner
E-mails from ‘the would-be homeless kids’ (you know who you are)
Tacos at Roma’s
Dancing with RAS at Lauren’s party
Oleg’s “phrase of the day” from Lauren
A missing “d” in Rel’s Happy Birthday sign
Camp Dance
Interpreter Katya V talking to me in Russian instead of English and confusing other interpreters :o)
Sharing “camp life” with Mom
Reciting a verse of the day in English, Russian and Ukrainian. I even got a giant pixi stick.
Banana Pudding.
Night at the V’s before RAS went home.
HP7, one of a kind, read 4 times over, complete with notes and bookmarks
Dr. Pepper Jelly Beans…not to mention the real thing!!! (thank you to all who kept me in stock throughout the summer)
Skateboarders who hung out with us in the city after camp.
Wes getting potatoes from the lady in the kitchen
A note on the back of an English test with nothing more than a cell phone # and instructions to call if I wanted to find out how good his English was.
The day the RAS spent too much time trying to figure out the next orientation schedule and we all went a little crazy
Helping Sergey sell CD’s…dressed as Ninja’s
The night Max shared his testimony with his sisters
The sword fights (except that one where Sergey almost lost a finger)
A tear drenched floor after one repentance night
My RAS ladies.

This is a very incomplete list. I sure have a lot to thank God for this summer. If you have a highlight from the summer, I would love for you to leave it as a comment on this blog :o) And hopefully my next blog won’t be quite as long in coming as this one was.

Ode to * and T.

2007-06-13T10:50:00.000+03:00

Ok, so yesterday I wrote this blog post about boxed beef for Mrs. Debbie, but alas it is lost in cyberspace and I haven’t the energy to recall my thought on the subject now.

Instead I will leave you with a commentary about the joy that is Tanya and Zhenya. Better known to some of you as “the Twins” or simply “Twins.” This post is quite fitting today being that this is the day they will board a plane and journey to your side of the ocean. Look out America, T and * are taking over, and that’s not just babble. Tanya and Zhenya are two of the most encouraging people I know and magnificent prayer warriors. Their individual hearts are MUCH bigger than this great country of Ukraine can contain. Energy is something they never seem to lack. Creativity oozes from the center of their being and is reflected in their never ending projects and presents. Pictures take on new meaning when you are with these girls and joy abounds. Love for life and discovery surrounds them. America, take care of these precious ladies.

And Ladies, this is no flattery. Only truth. “You must believe in God.” Make wise choices. Hug our boys. And know my prayers are with you. “Mom and Dad, I’m fine, how are you?...”

Thoughts before bedtime :o)

2007-04-28T09:43:00.000+03:00

*note to the reader* this post is very sporadic. Just some things I was thinking about as I was getting ready to go to bed tonight. Feel free to continue reading, but consider yourself warned.

Gosh, God has blessed me. I was talking to Jake and told him that if I were to die today, I would feel like I have had an INCREDIBLE life. But, chances are I will not die today, which means there will be MORE to my life than I have already experienced. AMAZING. I want to make it count. I want every moment, every action, every decision (this one is hard for me), every breath, to bring GLORY to His name.

I have been meeting many of the people who will be coming to Radooga this summer and it has been a HUGE encouragement to me. I really can not get over all the WONDERFUL people God keeps walking through my life.

We were also talking about how being on Summer Staff makes you family. But, thinking about it now, I really think it has less to do with the fact that we are Summer Staff and more to do with the fact that we spend time with each other working together the way the church was designed to work—being on summer staff doesn’t MAKE us family so much as us working together the way we do reflects the fact that we ARE family and the more we are able to experience that the more it becomes true in our relationships with each other. SO GOOD.

I got word that Radooga has a campsite for the summer. (we are unable to use the one we have used in the past because they are housing construction workers there all summer).

We still really need some people to come work camps 2 (June 25-July 7) and 4 (July 11-23) and have openings for camp 5 (July 19-31) so if you’re interested or know someone who might be let me know or register at www.servantlife.com :o)

И все. Я очень устала. Споки ноки.

Disoriented

2007-04-14T11:58:00.000+03:00

Ok, so, if I sound a bit incoherent at the moment, it would probably be because I am. It is 11:42am Saturday morning (Kiev time--i think 4:42am Tally time) and the last I slept was from 1:30-4:30am Thursday night before going to the airport. For some reason I usually can't sleep on planes. Nonetheless, all my flights went well...aside from some CRAZINESS in Memphis. (Daniel, if you are reading this I am SO sorry and I will call you at some point this week and tell you of my 'adventures in Memphis') I have no idea what all I will be doing this week--i'm kinda leaving my itinerary up to my mom and Calyn for now. Which so far consists of helping with some sort of breakfast that Four Oaks (Calyn's new church) is doing in about an hour and going to hear a guy representing Voice of the Martyrs speak at Northwoods tonight and somewhere in between trying to get my visa stuff sent off. Beyond that...I haven't really thought much...I will need to finish some stuff for work and see my uncle who drove over from Jacksonville to see me (which pretty much floored me when I head that he came mostly because he wanted to see me)...all that to say...anyone in Tally who has something exciting planned (and trust me...exciting to me doesn't usually involve too much), call m.y mom or Calyn and they will be with me or know how to reach me (they're good like that) Ok, I guess I should get ready and head to the Reber's...I will (quietly) bust in the kitchen door. (I love you Mrs. Debbie)

Peace out.

A Little Old School Encouragement :o)

2007-03-16T11:53:00.000+02:00

I was listening to this on my way to work this morning and it was...really encouraging for me to listen to again. Hope it encourages some of you guys too :o)

Beyond Belief

Words and music by Bob Hartman
Based on Hebrews 6:1a, Romans 1:17, Philippians 1:6

We're content to pitch our tent
When the glory's evident
Seldom do we know the glory came and went

Moving can seem dangerous
In this stranger's pilgrimage
Knowing that you can't stand still, you cross the bridge

(Chorus)
There's a higher place to go, beyond belief, beyond belief
Where we reach the next plateau, beyond belief, beyond belief
And from faith to faith we grow
Towards the center of the flow
Where He beckons us to go, beyond belief, beyond belief

Leap of faith without a net
Makes us want to hedge our bet
Waters never part until our feet get wet

There's a deeper place to go
Where the road seems hard to hoe
He who has begun this work won't let it go

And it takes so long to see the change
But we look around and it seems so strange

We have come so far but the journey's long
And we once were weak but now we're strong

The Moon is...Up

2007-03-06T13:13:00.000+02:00

Walking home from the conference in the wee hours of Sunday morning Sergey commented on how beautiful the moon was. Being a bit partial to the night sky for various reasons I stopped and stood in awe for a moment. Monday morning I had an e-mail from my mom telling me that there had been an eclipse on Saturday night. I didn't realize that was what I was looking at, but here is a picture of the moon over Kiev that night. Pretty awesome.

Speaking of night skies...I will be wishing on a star tonight.

"I have but one candle of life to burn, and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness than in a land flooded with light" --John Keith Falconer

Yay for Conference!

2007-03-01T14:32:00.000+02:00

I am SO excited about our first conference this weekend.

Please pray that amidst the craziness that comes with preparing for a conference that our focus would remain on Christ and helping those we encounter know Him better.

Pray that our youth would leave with a better understanding of Christ's call for them to be missionaries--in their home, school, city, country, and world.

"I have but one candle of life to burn, and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness than in a land flooded with light" -- John Keith Falconer

Falling Apart?

2007-02-21T13:02:00.000+02:00

“He is before all things and in Him all things hold together." This is the verse on my mirror right now and last night I was looking at it and it said something new to me. Funny how that sometimes happens. Something I’ve seen every morning for 2 months now, and tonight I see it differently? Strana. Maybe that’s pare of what it means when it says “the Word of God is living and active.” Anyway, I’m no Bible scholar and I didn’t go to look up the original meaning of the text or anything like that tonight, so maybe what I saw is not at all what it really says, but it still makes sense and that is this: ‘IN him all things hold together.’ I used to read that and see that He is before all things and BECAUSE of Him all things hold together. Tonight, that’s not what it says at all it says that IN Him they hold together, which would also admit that APART from Him they don’t—hold together, that is. No wonder sometimes my life seems to be falling apart. Maybe it is. Maybe it needs to until I find myself IN Him again. Someone once said something about how cool it would be if after death someone came to ‘examine’ my life and they couldn’t find any evidence at all that I had lived because the only prints that had been left were those of God. What an incredible challenge…to be found IN Him at all times. “He must become greater I must become less” John 3:30

I miss Calyn

2007-02-20T14:51:00.000+02:00

And even though I know

how very far apart we are,

it helps to think we might be wishing

on the same bright star.

2007-02-19T11:11:00.001+02:00

My sacrifice is not enough.

He will not here my words, only my heart.

Jesus. He is the reason I may enter the presence of my Father.

Isaiah 1:10-17

10 Hear the word of the LORD,
you rulers of Sodom;
listen to the law of our God,
you people of Gomorrah!

11 "The multitude of your sacrifices—
what are they to me?" says the LORD.
"I have more than enough of burnt offerings,
of rams and the fat of fattened animals;
I have no pleasure
in the blood of bulls and lambs and goats.

12 When you come to appear before me,
who has asked this of you,
this trampling of my courts?

13 Stop bringing meaningless offerings!
Your incense is detestable to me.
New Moons, Sabbaths and convocations—
I cannot bear your evil assemblies.

14 Your New Moon festivals and your appointed feasts
my soul hates.
They have become a burden to me;
I am weary of bearing them.

15 When you spread out your hands in prayer,
I will hide my eyes from you;
even if you offer many prayers,
I will not listen.
Your hands are full of blood;

16 wash and make yourselves clean.
Take your evil deeds
out of my sight!
Stop doing wrong,

17 learn to do right!
Seek justice,
encourage the oppressed.
Defend the cause of the fatherless,
plead the case of the widow.

Strana...Inistrana...

2007-02-15T12:08:00.000+02:00

So, last night I was on my way home and my marshrooka driver, I guess, decided that we needed gas becuase we pulled into a gas station to fill up. I was highly amused.